When Lying is Okay

Is it ever okay to lie?  The Ten Commandments (Ex. 20) prohibits lying on one another.  The Bible calls Satan the "father of lies", and says that God hates lies.   But I am wondering if there are some loopholes.  Is it okay to lie if someone's life is at stake?  Is it okay to lie when we are facing uncertainty?  Is it okay to lie when the truth is inconvenient?  What about lies by omission?  Where do we draw the line?  More importantly, where does God draw the line?  Are our lines cohesive, or do they take divergent paths?

I am wondering what you think.  I usually don't ask so many questions in one post, but I am pondering these things right now, and I like to ponder with someone.  It helps.  If you've lied recently, what was the reason?  How did you justify it in your mind?  Was it worth it, or did the consequences outweigh the expected gains?

Marriage is Outdated

Is it true?  Could marriage be on the verge of extinction?  Apparently Cameron Diaz feels that marriage is unimportant and old-fashioned.The divorce rate is high and continues to rise.  Many choose simply to live together without marrying.  Others procreate outside of marriage.
Does marriage still have value?  Why or why not?

Fear of divorce seems to be enough to keep many from ever walking down the aisle.  Why get married if it won't last anyway?  I'm curious what you think?  Is marriage simply a contract with no real meaning, or is marriage a beautiful covenant that can be a lifelong celebration?

Unseen Advantage

He's humble, and he wins games.  He doesn't get into trouble off the field.  Yet, he's ridiculed and despised by sports writers and analysts everywhere.  Why?  Oh, he's a Christian.  Why is Tim Tebow being persecuted for his faith?

I don't watch much football, but we've all heard about this guy who wasn't expected to win.  Yet week after week he's been confounding the almighty sports "psychics" who think they know what's coming.  Favor, anyone? 

I feel convicted watching this quiet servant pray and give glory to God.  Is my public faith obvious enough to draw ridicule, or have I been flying low under the radar?  How about you?  Has anyone "mistaken" you for a Christ-follower recently?  Why or why not?

Virtual Beauty

Last week I stumbled into a mini firestorm.  Apparently real women are not en vogue right now for modeling.  The H&M clothing company has decided to use virtual models for swim suit and lingerie models.  They've been criticized heavily for this choice.  They were accused of "creating unrealistic physical ideals" by a Norwegian company in the ABC News article I read, while the company defends its position to simply show off the clothes.

What I'm trying to figure out is how this is any different from the live models that are usually used especially for these types of clothing?  My body doesn't look like a swimsuit model's, and I have no illusions that it does.  So if most women don't look like models, how is this affecting the self image of women any worse that live models?  Help me out.  Am I missing something.  Real of virtual?  Does it make a difference?

Peace in a Storm

As we move from the Thanksgiving holiday into the Christmas season, I am putting things into perspective.  This has been a very financially hard year for my family.  I know we are not alone in this fact, and many of you can probably relate.  The interesting thing is that God has used this time period to increase my faith in Him.  He has miraculously provided for us in ways that we could not understand or foresee.  Our own thinking would have dictated a different path for us, but God has our steps marked out.

I don't know what's next for us.  I am weeks from graduating and no closer to finding a new job.  I just keep hearing God tell me to trust Him and walk forward without looking away from Him.  He promised to meet all of my needs, and I am resting in that today.  I am working not to dwell on my circumstances no matter how tempting it is to do so.  God has never left me alone.  When I feel far away from Him, I realize that I am the one who moved away.

As we prepare for Santa's visit, I am wondering how we will put presents under the tree.  I know that God will meet our needs and some of our wants too.  I am carrying the spirit of Thanksgiving into the Christmas holiday. I am not stressing over cyber Monday or all of the alleged sales that are taking place right now.  I am enjoying the peace that comes from knowing God is holding me and teaching me right now where I am.

Something New

For I am about to do something new.  See, I have already begun!  Do you not see it?  I will make a pathway through the wilderness.  I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.  (Isaiah 43:19, NLT from YouVersion)

From Jim Liestman http://www.flickr.com/people/gods-art/  

If you're like me, you love new things.  New clothes, definitely new shoes and even a new car or some new jewelry.  We love our shiny new things.


In this season of my life when things are tight, and the economy is squeezing our budget to the max, I treasure new things more than ever before.  This sense of awe is not only reserved for presents.  I celebrate new paper towels.  New sunrises.  New discoveries and new revelations.  


This verse encouraged me to realize that newness can simply be a state of mind.  It also excited me to think that in this time of "dry wastelands", God has already begun to do something new in my life!  I am eager to to follow Him out of this wilderness.


Father God, as we travel along paths marked with uncertainly, remind us that you are with us.  Help us to trust the new things that you are bringing into our lives and to fully embrace them.  In your Son's name, Amen.

Restored

Three years ago, last month, we lost our baby to miscarriage. I was surprised that I didn't mark the date or post anything on the 24th. When it first happened, I thought the date would forever be burned in my brain. I thought the pain in my heart would not cease and that I would never truly be happy again. I was certain the whole in my heart would never be mended. I did not understand His ways. But God is a God of restoration.

Instead of marking the month on October with immeasurable sadness, I spent it celebrating the birthday of the most precious two-year old in the world. Forgive me, I'm biased. She is such a happy baby. What I realize is that I would not have her had the other baby lived. God has a way of reminding me of His love when I need it the most. He brings joy where tears once lived. Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning. It's morning, y'all.

Sexy Girls

My husband and I have been going back and forth about costumes for Halloween. I told him that I think it's ridiculous that the only costumes available for women are the tawdry ones that require you to be half naked. I guess he thinks it's a fair representation of the holiday they are made for. In that regard, maybe he's right. But I've always enjoyed dressing up for fall parties, and I refuse to look like a prostitute preparing for a shift.

What I wear with my husband and what I wear in public are two very different things. Some things should be left to the imagination. Our bodies are not for objectification. We need to respect ourselves. It is possible to look pretty and even sexy without being slutty.

Costume makers have even made "sexy" outfits for the under 13 girls. I had the misfortune of seeing some on the shelf in a costume shop over the weekend. If moms are walking out with cleavage bared and skirts that hardly pass for belts, is it any wonder our daughters want to mimic what they see us do?

As women, we should dress in ways that make it easy for us to be treated with respect. A man will not love a woman he doesn't respect. And a woman who does not respect herself is not loving herself. I realize there is a broad range of what each of us finds "respectable". Let's just use caution in choosing what we wear and where we post the pics. No regrets.

My Secret Thoughts

I want to tell you that things have been extremely hard for us lately. Our cars are all in disrepair. Our finances are truly inadequate. There have been times in the last few months when I have questioned God. I have yelled at Him. I have doubted Him. I have quite talking to Him. I have experienced such a range of emotions that I thought I was losing my mind.

I have made futile attempts to stand on God's promises and fallen short. I have wondered how long this season will last. I have wondered what I did wrong and evaluated my life. I have wondered where God was and whether or not He was laughing at me.

But today He spoke to me. As I was putting the finishing touching on dinner, the lyrics to a Fred Hammond song came into my head. Since I haven't heard it in a very long time, I knew this whisper was from God. I instructed our oldest child to bring my CDs, and I began to listen. I fully intended to go straight to that song, but God had another plan. I ended up listening to the whole thing.

I laughed, I cried. I shouted out loud. I prayed and even begged God to forgive my lack of faith. In a way that only He can, He reached out and wrapped me in His arms through each song's message. With puffy eyes, I write this with a subtle smile. My heart feels light, and my spirit is renewed.

Though nothing in my circumstances have changed, my thoughts toward God are back where they need to be, I realize that He has been there all along. I feel loved and protected now in a way I have been missing. I feel immeasurable gratitude.

Trials come to make us stronger and to show God's glory. By the time we pass through this, I will be stronger than Samson with the wisdom of Solomon. I have stomped on the devil's head and let Him know who I have working for me. He has to back off now.

'Til Death Do Us Part

Marriage and divorce are common occurrences in our country. The divorce rate is appallingly high, and many say that no one stays married any more. Gordon and Norma Yeager of Iowa recently died after more than 70 years of marriage. Imagine what they saw and the challenges that they faced during their time together. Any of us who is married knows that at times marriage can take you to your breaking point, but it doesn't have to end in divorce. In joy and trials, marriages are meant to be lifelong covenants with few exceptions. Let their story inspire you to hold on for dear life until God takes one (or both) of you home.

Help

Our youngest child is a fireball. She's almost two, and she has no fear. This is both funny and frightening. Her latest adventure lead her to climb into her pack and play unaided. Getting in was not problem. Getting out, however, was another story. I watched closely as she dangled precariously on the edge. She did not hesitate to say, "Mommy, help."

She pointed me to the invisible God with that single request. There was no doubt in her voice. She had complete faith that I would help her out of the jam she got herself into. I've found myself in need of a lot of help lately. Life has thrown me some mighty curve balls this past year, and I have found myself feeling discouraged and overwhelmed at times. I am thankful that my small child reminded me that I need only to ask for help, and God will answer.

Psalm 121

A song of ascents.

¹ I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
where does my help come from?
² My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

³ He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;
⁴ indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

⁵ The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
⁶ the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

⁷ The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;
⁸ the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore. (NIV: Biblegateway.com)

What No one Else Can Do

One of the chief lessons I learned from reading, The Purpose Driven Life by Pastor Rick Warren years ago, was that we are placed here on this earth to complete a purpose that no one else can. Each of us is born with a unique job to do; no one else can do our job.

Deborah and Jael performed such a job in the book of Judges, chapters 4 and 5. Deborah was one of Israel's great judges. Jael, a simple tent maker. After years of oppression by Sisera, these women stepped up when men were afraid. They were confident that God would grant them victory because He said so, and He was true to His promise.

Lately, I've been convicted of taking too long to accomplish my purpose. I have spent too much time planning and not enough time doing. God placed the story of Deborah right in front of my face this week. He reminded me that I will accomplish nothing for His glory in my own strength. I should not fear failure or inadequacy when God is directing the mission. With His help, I'm ready to move forward: NOW. No more hesitation. I have only one life to live and one purpose to fulfill. No more excuses.

Thank you God for your patience with me and your gentle reminder.

Miniature God

I'm sure most of you know what a Polly Pocket Doll is. She's super tiny, and as her name implies, she can fit into your pocket. Perhaps some of you preferred Micro Machines when you were growing up. They were a more macho version of Polly. Both were portable toys that you could fit in the smallest of places. They were also easily misplaced.

So I started thinking: how often do I reduce God to this size? How often do I limit His ability to handle my life by underestimating His greatness and His power? Sometimes I think God, the same one that made the whole world in less than a week, cannot make sure we have enough money to cover our mortgage or cure my child's cold. Well, it sounds ludicrous when I say it that way.

And it is, ludicrous. Ephesians 3:20 tells me that He can do exceedingly, abundantly more than anything I can even think or ask through His power within me! Wow! That's huge because I've been thinking and asking for a whole bunch lately, and it's good to know I've been going to the right place with my outrageous requests. No one else can take care of me like He can, and I feel silly for forgetting that when life gets hard.

So I'm upsizing God in my mind today. I am taking Him out of my pocket and placing Him back where He should be. He is too great and too powerful to be reduced by my small thinking and lack of faith. If you don't think He's up for the challenge, bring it on. I'm sure He'll deliver. After all, He delivered me. There's plenty to go around.

God, please forgive me for doubting You and what you've already done for me. I've seen miracles in my life, and I know you have more good things for me. Thank you for your love and for holding me up with your capable hands. There is no one like you. Thank you for accepting me in my brokenness and turning me into something beautiful. Help me not to doubt You. Amen.

Image 1 from Mattel.com

Image 2 from thethrottle.thechive.com

Under Construction

Please pardon my *dust* while I make some changes to this blog. The empty tabs are a step of faith anticipating things to come that God has placed on my heart. Please pray for me as I make changes and follow God's plan for me. I don't know what is around the corner, but I'm glad I know Who is in charge! Stay tuned. It might be a bumpy ride, but I am working out my faith.

Broken + Rubies

Sin had us broken, cut-off from our Creator. Once we came to Him, we were required to subdue our own will and seek His will first. Out of our brokenness, He makes us beautiful.

He treasures us. We are precious; priceless and unique; rubies. He grants us His wisdom if we only seek it and follow Him. We are broken rubies.

Rubies

Rubies are precious stones, dark red in color.

Precious = of great value or high price*

Precious = highly esteemed of cherished*

I would like to think that the deep red color of the ruby represents the color of the blood that Jesus poured out for me and for you.

Each of us is a ruby. We are precious in His sight. We are bought with the high price of Christ's blood, and we are most valuable to Him. He esteems us highly and cherishes us as His own.

If you had a 3carat, flawless ruby, how would you treat it? Would you carelessly toss it around? Would you expose it to thieves? Or would you polish it every day and keep it under lock and key? How much more precious are you? You are so much more valuable to God than a ruby.

Proverbs tells us that a wife with good character is more valuable than rubies. Is also teaches us that wisdom is more precious than rubies. The Bible refers to wisdom as "her". Wisdom is using good judgment. It is uncompromising is its standards. We are all different shapes and sizes. We differ in hue. But we are all precious rubies, nonetheless.

God takes us in our raw, uncut form. He polishes us and shapes us, revealing our true beauty within.

"Wisdom is more precious than rubies;

nothing you desire can compare with her." Proverbs 3:15

Do our lives reflect our "ruby" status?

*Definitions from Webster's Dictionary

** Image 1 from www.gdphoto.com

Image 2 from www.ramaura.com

Broken

Broken = cut-off or disconnected.*

Since Eve took and ate the forbidden fruit, she was cut-off from perfect communion with God. As her daughters, we suffer the same fate. God sent His only son, Jesus to rectify this disconnection. If we accept Him as the sacrifice for our sins, He becomes our bridge back to God, His Father. In order to live for Him, we must be broken.

Broken = subdued completely.*

We have to put our will aside and seek God's will first. Our will must be subdued. As we learn to submit to His will, turning away from our sin, all else will fall into place. Everything will work together for our good if we love and serve Him. We put our lives into His capable hands and allow His will to govern our thoughts and rule our hearts.

"The sacrifice you desire is a broken spirit.

You will not reject a broken and repentant heart, O God."

Psalm 51:17

Are you broken?

*Definitions from Webster's Dictionary

Everyday, With Thanksgiving

It is often difficult to praise God in the middle of hard times. When I miscarried, I had a hard time seeing God's hand. When I lost my job, I wondered what would happen next. When my nephew got cancer, I thought it was a cruel prank. The Bible reminds us that we will have troubles in this world, not might. So why are we so surprised when things don't go our way? Why do we begin to worry and doubt God? I am reminding myself today that I can not add any time to my life by worrying about the tomorrows that aren't promised to me. I will subtract time if I take this approach. I am reminding myself to give thanks to the Lord in spite of the tough fiscal times we are facing right now. God promised to supply all of our needs, and I am doing my best to trust Him to do just that. He promised that all things would ultimately work together for my good, and that's pretty amazing. Be encouraged, dear sisters.

Gender Stereotypes

My sister by marriage posted this story on Facebook, and I'm dying to know what all of you think about it. I will reserve my opinions for a later time.

Dead Terrorist Parade

By now we have all gotten the news of Bin Laden's demise. There have been various responses to the news. Shock. Doubt. Elation.

The other day I saw people marching and cheering and chanting with glee over the death of the this creepy terrorist. Though I thought it odd, it never occurred to me that it might be wrong.

That's when I saw a post on Facebook from one of my favorite authors, Liz Curtis Higgs. She posted Proverbs 24:17. It says: " Do not gloat when your enemy falls; when he stumbles, do not let your heart rejoice." Ouch!

Kudos to her for her willingness to take this very unpopular stance. I, for one, appreciated the reminder. Following God's will for us is often unpopular, but He calls us to be set apart.

President Obama has also declined to release the graphic photos of the body and the site. I have heard people asking for them, but he too has taken a stand. He stated, "That's not who we are. We don't trot out this stuff as trophies." I can remember being disturbed by images of Saddam Hussein hanging while crowds jeered, and I am grateful we were spared this time.

I Hate Weddings

My heart is full this morning. As many of you may know, I hate weddings. It may seem odd that a woman hates weddings, but it's true. I hate them passionately. Here's why...

Once upon a time a wedding was a representation of something sacred. It was a symbol of the commitment before God and each other to work at a holy marriage together, forever. With a 50% divorce rate, we've clearly strayed away from that idea. Divorce is an acceptable option now, and it's expected. Few work at staying married, each too concerned with his own happiness over God's holiness. The ceremony is filled with false promises.

The other reason I hate weddings is the white dress and the veil covering the bride's face. Why is this done? A white dress is a symbol of virginity, and the veil signifies modesty and purity. Do I really need to elaborate? Well, I don't mind if I do.

Today Prince William married Kate Middleton. I saw her "lovely" white dress and virginal veil splashed over Yahoo, and I shook my head. They were away on vacation together when he proposed. They moved in together before the wedding, and with the blessing of the Archbishop! He justified giving his blessing because "modern" couples want to "try out the milk before buying the cow"! Click here for the complete article.

Why the veil? What are you covering when the groom has already sampled everything? Why the white? Are we to believe they've been sleeping alone? Instead of setting an example for all of the young girls watching, they bowed to modernity like so many others before. It's so sad that an archbishop would forsake the Bible and bless their choice.

I want my daughters and son to aspire to wear white honestly. Our society has taken away the meaning. Brides are secretly scoffed at when they choose to do so and haven't earned it. Others simply wear creme or champagne since savvy designers have declared white "outdated" and off white colors "chic". Weddings are about more than "tradition", and we should treat them as such. They should not be a show. One should not say vows before a God that they do not honor with their lives. It's not a requirement, is it?

I am not trying to be harsh, and I welcome your thoughts. I am not trying to be judgmental, as it is my intention to edify. But I do not apologize for speaking truth from God's word. We are commanded to do nothing less.

While fashion trends change, God word doesn't. Sex is to be reserved for marriage. Teaching anything less is to rob ourselves and our children of what married love is meant to be. We can not teach a gospel that follows trends and modern thought. That is faulty at the core. Our lives should conform to the Bible. It is time that Christians stand up and be an example. Let the white of our wedding attire represent the purity in our lives.

Photo from Charliesbridal.com

Lost in 1812

What is it about inspirational historical fiction that gets women so sappy? Why do these authors sell so many books? Who wants to live in the past? What's the big deal? What does the 19th century have that the 21st doesn't?

Innocence. That's the difference. The women are not brazen. They still *blush*, and they actually wear undergarments (sort of). They are not showing so much skin that the men are blushing. They are not chasing men and throwing themselves at them. They are concerned with being a woman of virtue. They are concerned with being a GODLY wife and mother and with having a godly husband.

These differences make these books appealing to those who feel that we have lost much in this so-called progressive generation. Progression is only good when it makes us better. What we have now is not better, no matter how good we women are at lying to ourselves and each other.

Men have not changed what they want in wives. No one wants to marry the girl who has given herself to everyone and shows no signs of slowing down. They still want something to be left to
the imagination. Most probably think a home-cooked meal is a lovely bonus.

Perhaps we should take a page out of 1812 an reinvent 21st century womanhood with that as an example. It doesn't mean we have to pretend to be helpless or stupid, although it doesn't hurt to make a man feel needed. It does mean we should stop using sexuality to manipulate men. It means we should cover up and guard our tongues. It means we should strive more to be a Proverbs 31 woman, and less like a Cosmo girl. For a good example, read The English Garden
Series by Lori Wick.

Drop Out?

Most of you know that I've been a super busy student for the last few months, thus the decreased blogging. I am proud to report that I have not yet dropped out of school in spite of the excessive homework. This is probably the most difficult time I've had balancing my family. Work had set hours, so their was no interference with that time.

However, taking courses on line and taking care of my family have been quite challenging roles. For one, my littlest munchkin likes to press the power button as I'm pressing send on the screen. She is also fond of sitting on the keyboard while I'm typing papers. If that doesn't work, she just closes the laptop on my hands. Hmmm...

At times, I wonder if I am doing the right thing. "God, is this really what you want me to be doing at this stage of my life?" Then I realize that children have to learn that every hour of every day can not be dedicated to their every whim. There is nothing in the mommy handbook that says it should be. As long as I am taking care of their needs, and maybe a few wants, I have to let myself off the hook.

I am learning to invest in myself a little. I am working on not feeling guilty about it. I have learned that it is alright not to have a perfectly tidy home if it means I get to play with the kids when my homework is through. And so, for now, I will press toward the mark and persevere. Now if I can just decide what I want to be when I grow up...

Weaker and Wiser

My mom always says that each generation is weaker but wiser. Lately I've been wondering what that really means. I'm starting to think it means more knowledgeable but much more stupid.

There is so much technology that teens can find out anything on the phone in the palm of their hands. Texting has replaced talking. But in this Google age, are the teens in your life smarter or worse for the wear?

I love technology, so please don't think I'm bashing technology. I just think many teens are too smart (literally), for their own good. Parents can't keep up, and many don't bother trying. In the mean time we are losing a generation of young people to the devil's many snares.

They are losing their virginity at alarming rates. The generations before are successfully teaching our young women to set their standards low and keep them there. They have heard the message loud and clear. It's time for us to do better.

We are to be an example. We need to stop settling, and stop lying to ourselves and anyone else who is fool enough to listen. We need to be real friends to each other and lovingly call our girls out when we see them slipping in patterns of stupidity. You've been challenged, and called out. Now what are you gonna do about it?

Playing the Game

"I am doing what most American women have forgotten how to do, I am holding out until I get the respect that I deserve." Jason (The Game)

The sitcom, The Game returned to television last night after a long absence. While watching, I was struck by the above listed quote by the ball player. He was previously a star but felt disrespected by his team. He had decided to hold out for a contract that he could appreciate, one that compensated his talent and experience.

Although he was referring to his contract, what he said about American women was profound, and it really stayed with me. The statement is so true, it's sad! The good majority of American women barely hold out for a meal, let alone a marriage! I don't feel the need to bog us down with statistics because it isn't necessary.

Girls, we know that most of our friends will sleep with a man under any circumstance. He might be married, or my favorite, separated. She may have one of those "no strings attached" arrangements. The notion of saving sex for love does not exist, so waiting for marriage isn't even an option for most young women today.

The standards are low, and the consequences are extreme. Yet, in spite of the risks and repercussions, promiscuity abounds. Women need to return to being standard bearers. Stop sleeping with multiple men. Hold out until we get the respect that we deserve. In order to earn respect, we must act and dress respectfully and adhere to the highest precepts. We have a choice.