The Folly of Facebook

It was an ordinary evening. My husband and I were preparing to go to bed, but decided to check in on Facebook before doing so. Big mistake.

We eavesdropped on a young woman having a vicious cyber-argument with another. It was very colorful and would probably get her convicted in a court of law.

Another night I was awake for a late night feeding and saw someone venting about her lying, cheating boyfriend.

Still another posted photographs of herself scantily clad at underage drinking parties.

I've seen break-ups and make-ups, all played out on Facebook (or Twitter).

While we all do stupid things, most of us like to keep those things private. I have no desire to publish every stupid thought I have or broadcast arguments for all to see.

In this digital age, what you post is permanent. Someone can find it. Parents and potential employers alike can see what you're really like.

When I read teenagers pining away for significant others, I usually laugh. Not because their feelings aren't real, but because I remember how I was at that age. I'm glad there are no public records of my fleeting feelings. Old diary entries are painful enough.

When I see grown women discussing drunk driving excursions publicly, I wonder if they're still drunk when they're writing. It would be pretty sad if you're trying to beat a DUI, and the prosecutor has a printout of your own Facebook post to use against you.

Using caution is wise. The problem with social networking sights is that many people type first and think later. What I feel right now is bound to change. And while I may later delete the post, someone has already seen it. I would caution girls to hold off writing about your argument with your man. What if he sees it or hears about it and you're still together? Hold off posting pics of the wild weekend party you attended if your coworkers could be your Facebook friend. Refrain from using profanity if your aunt and dad also see your posts and don't realize that your language is reprehensible.

In God's Word, Job 28:18 teaches us that the price of wisdom is beyond rubies. As a woman, I often talk first and think later. I'm sure Tre will attest to that. As a writer, I must be conscious of what I put out there for others to see. So while we enjoy our social networking, we must be wise to protect our dignity and our future.

Imaginary Rivals

Happy Holidays! Seasons Greetings!

Some of you are probably cringing right now. She's a Christian. Why didn't she say Merry Christmas? You can't have Christmas without Christ! And yes, we are eagerly awaiting the arrival of good Saint Nick in our house.

We've all heard the controversy surrounding the proper way to state your holiday salutations, and frankly, I don't get it! I may make enemies here, and although it's not my intention, I'm willing to risk it.

I've seen people get very angry when wished Happy Holidays. In a hostile tone, they respond with Merry Christmas (emphasis on the Christ part). Now if I say Merry Christmas in a hostile way, I'm pretty sure it takes the "merry" out of it, but that's just me. Folks respond as though you've just told them to take a long walk off a short pier!

And, oh my, if you're a person who allows your child to believe in the magic of Santa Claus, some Christians treat you like a freak of nature. According to Wikipedia, the legend of Santa Claus is based upon the man of Saint Nicholas who is revered by Catholics and Orthodox Christians all over the world as a gift giver. Sounds like a nice guy.

Please don't misunderstand what I'm saying. I know that the meaning of our Christmas celebration is to commemorate the birth of our precious Savior with His humble beginnings. That is what we believe and what we teach our children. However, Santa Claus is everywhere this time of the year, and I think he's a happy looking guy. My precious children think so too.

I'd actually never remembered believing in Santa as a child, and for some reason Mimi does. She asked questions based upon what she'd heard from other kids. I actually enjoy believing in the magic of Santa through her and now Xavier. It's fun. Last year we put out reindeer food. Perhaps Santa will get cookies this year. We're definitely not too traditional in our Santa rituals! I think this jolly guy is as harmless as the Easter Bunny, Goldilocks or the Tooth Fairy.

While the greatest gift of all came to Earth in the form of a baby, many parents go into hock to buy Jr everything in the world. There are lights draped everywhere. The center of the party is a huge tree and unhealthy foods! My point is, why have we chosen to attack only Santa? Why not only give presents to others in need and receive nothing? How "merry" would that be? We know that we are seldom buying things that we need any way. Why not avoid unhealthy Christmas cookies and eat only vegetables? Sounds silly right? That's my point.

Christians are very good at alienating others. Christmas is another opportunity for us to do so. If a non-Christian tells me Happy Holidays and asks what I want from Santa, I have a choice in how I respond. I can happily wish them Happy Holidays and tell them that I've already received the greatest gift. I can also say that I wouldn't mind a laptop to go along with it! Or, I can glare at him, say Merry Christmas , and make sure he knows that Santa is evil! With approach number two, you also need to forget that the person is Jewish and celebrates Hanukkah. This is why I don't mind Happy Holidays. There are other celebrations taking place during this time of the year, and this allows us to acknowledge them without leaving anyone out, except Scrooge or the Grinch maybe.

No fictional character can rival the truth of Jesus Christ. Not in birth or in death. Santa and Jesus can peacefully coexist in our home. At least for now...

The Power to Persevere

Before our daughter was born, I had already decided to nurse her. They always say it's best, although I don't know if "they" have ever tried it. Warning, the following may not be for the faint of heart, but stick with me, I'm going somewhere.

The first day of nursing is filled with anticipation as the long awaited little bundle lays snuggled in your arms awaiting her first meal. I remember this day clearly with each of my children. As I wipe back tears of joy, I draw my child close to me and nourish her. But by the end of day one, those tears of joy have turned to tears of pain! Picture cracking, soreness and bleeding. Use your imagination.

Many days I wanted to reach for Enfamil. Other days I wanted to have my head examined. When the milk did not come, I wanted to give up. When I awakened in a pool of milk, I wanted to scream. When engorgement happened, the pain drove me toward a bottle. When, after all of this, my daughter refused to eat for no apparent reason, I was certain this sacrifice was too much for me to endure.

My husband encouraged me to persevere. He reminded me of the struggles I'd had with the other two and let me know it would all work out. I prayed. I cried. And prayed and cried some more. I'm pleased to say that it is working out. Everything is alright. I'm persevering, and it's paying off. Our daughter is healthy. She is growing exponentially. Praise God!

My point is this, I could have given up. Many times I wanted to do just that. It is often tempting to quit when it hurts. When love is painful, we want to throw in the towel. When a friend betrays us, we become reclusive. I'm learning to pray in the strangest of circumstances.

As I breathed through contractions, I prayed. As I subsequently pushed and felt every pain, I prayed, imploring God to help me to get through it. I knew that I couldn't do it in my own strength. I chose to nurse, and I chose to deliver naturally. For me, it was best. And when my alert baby looked at me for the first time with amazing clarity, I knew it was worth it!

When we struggle to endure, we should go to the God who never leaves us. We should realize that difficulty doesn't need to conquer us.

Many times it is necessary for us to go through the fire to get to the gold. If distractions are keeping you from quiet time with God, persevere. If you feel distant from Him, persevere. Don't let our enemy steal from you. Don't settle for second best. Push through the pain and persevere.

Reborn

It feels so good to write again. Even as a I do so, a small person is resting in my lap. As her hand clasps my shirt, I feel incredibly blessed. I've missed writing. I'm so passionate about it, and I've felt a void in its absence. I have missed the camaraderie with my friends who enjoy my musings, and even those who don't enjoy them!

As most of you know, I safely delivered our third child on October 22nd! We are so thrilled and thankful beyond words. I have since been immersed in mothering. For the first time in years I feel like a real wife and mother. Most importantly, I feel like me again! I'm tired, but fulfilled. I am enjoying my life. I got to visit my husband at work in the middle of the day. Although my body aches, and I feel like I need a hip replacement, I am overjoyed! Sorry for all of the exclamation points, I'm just very happy.

As I transition into a new chapter of my life, I ask for your prayers. My husband is ministering to the youth at our church now (an answer to a long-time prayer), and I long to be by his side in service. I also wish to involve myself in women's ministry but feel pulled in too many directions. Right now I need not to worry, but my mind is not listening. I do trust God for His direction, but I have Him on my schedule. Fail! Please join me in prayer. There is a fire burning inside me, and I can't wait to see how God brings it to fruition. Trust Him with and for me. Stop by and say hello.

I Parked My Jet at My Castle

I just tripped over an article about Forbes Top 400. The people named are all billionaires. If you're like me, you don't even know how many zeros that is off the top of your head. The article talks about the things they could buy if they wanted to. The list includes jets, islands and castles. The part that most caught my eye was when the author stated that these rich people could purchase the entire economy of many countries! Those on the list are said to have a collective wealth of over 1 trillion dollars!

Bill Gates, the mogul behind Microsoft, is worth about $50 billion. The article says that his personal worth is greater than the GDP of 140 countries, including Costa Rica and Bolivia. For some of you this may come as a shock. For others, you may not be as surprised. I feel the need to put these facts into perspective.

The GDP, or gross domestic product, of a country is the total value of goods and services made within a country according to Wikipedia. This includes income and investments. It is used to estimate economic performance and the overall standard of living of the residents.

Let's take Bolivia. According to Wikipedia, it is a country with a population of about 9 million people and a nearly 60% poverty level and a GDP lower than all other South American countries. The article also states that many of the women of the country are illiterate.

From this perspective, I find Gates' wealth much more intriguing. One man has the resources of 9 million people. The question is: what does he do with it? According to this article, he and his wife established the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation in 2000. It also states that they have given over $28 billion to charitable organizations. While the foundation is tax exempt and their giving is tax deductible, I find this number astonishing still.

Luke 12:48 tells us that much is required from the one who has been given much. Do we really believe that? If we all gave what we are capable of giving, would poverty exist in this world? Would any person go hungry? How can a person love his own wealth so much that he is willing to let others starve or die of treatable illnesses because they can't afford or access health care? While I'm not referring to Mr. Gates as being stingy, there are many wealthy people who feel no sense of responsibility for those who are less fortunate around them. I find that appalling.

This scripture does not simply apply to the extremely rich, and I don't believe it's talking only about money. All of us are given something, and all of us have opportunities to share those gifts with others. Pay it forward today.

Mixed Emotions

As my third trimester progresses, there are many thoughts that cross my mind. How much more can my skin stretch? What do my toes look like? Will this baby be early or on time? What will this delivery be like?

There are days when I'm so tired of being pregnant. The days when I am in pain for the entire day or when I'm so short of breath that I can barely function. My most recent feeling was one of sadness. The midwife started giving me delivery info and signs of labor. I realized that my pregnancy is on the downswing now. I'm pretty sure I probably won't be pregnant again after this one. So when I start thinking that I only have a handful of weeks left, I'm happy and sad.

Thoughts of postpartum depression and recovery after the delivery make me remember times past. But thankfully the overwhelming excitement of finally meeting this precious bundle who has been tap dancing on my bladder and distorting my stomach takes precedence. I can't wait to hold her and kiss her and feed her. This is a new chapter. I'm looking forward to being restored. I thanks God for second chances.

What's in a Song?

When choosing a church, what are your criteria? Which components make your short list? Many stick to denominational lines. Others may ignore the denomination as long as they agree with what the church believes.

I'm not as concerned with denomination. One aspect that does affect my thoughts is music. I'm addicted to music. It speaks to me like no other media. Music enters into my soul and alters my point of view. I have had some of my most worshipful experiences during or after a powerful praise song.

Here's my question: Does it matter what type of music is being played? Could you worship as well with a traditional hymn as you could with contemporary Christian? Does a praise and worship team get the job done for you, or do you have to have a gospel choir to get your praise juices flowing?

I'm one of those people who enjoy most music types. I can usually find
a few songs to love in any musical genre. With that being said, I do have
preferences for some over others. I'm big int instruments, so I prefer beautiful piano accompaniment over pipe organs. I prefer drums to a guitar. I love wind instruments and brass more than bells. When does preference begin to impede one's ability to worship in any environment?

If the heart of the music is the words, is it wrong if you feel hindered in worship because you find it impossible to like the song regardless of the potent lyrics? I struggle with this a lot and would love to hear your opinion.

Photo #1 by purbancik
Photo #2 by zen

Too Many People in Our Bed

As a working mom of two young children, I'm pretty busy most of the time. Since we are expecting our third child, I think I've moved into a new category of people. I'm officially weird. For those of you who know me, you may say this has nothing to do with the children, but bear with me.

Many who see me often seemed surprised that I'm expecting another child. I'm not sure why. There's the obvious: You already have a boy and a girl. And your point is? I actually had someone tell me that they did not know I was expecting another one. They followed with, "Was it planned?" Wow. How bold and how very personal. What goes on in my bedroom is now the public's business!

I don't see the big deal. I'm happily married for over 9 years. We have jobs and support our own children. Our current children are happy and healthy. Did I mention, I'm married? People have asked me if I'm happy about the baby? How do you respond to such ludicrous questions?

I'm appalled that someone would ask me if my child was planned or if I'm happy about it. I should have answered in an equally insane way. "Actually this child is not mine, I've agreed to be a surrogate for a coworker. Don't worry, they're paying me well." The sad fact is that many would accept this answer better than that we simply wanted another child in spite of the fact that we have 1 boy and 1 girl already. Our society is so strange...

Our children are blessings, and I think I'd have 20 if we could afford it and if they didn't all come from me!

A Kid Noone Wants

Apparently the internet brings adoptive children straight into your living room. I appreciate the aspect of convenience, but I find it slightly disturbing to be shopping for children as though they were a pair of shoes or a used DVD. Perhaps I am thinking the wrong way.

Unfortunately, there are many unwanted children born each day. While adoption is often "sold" as a great alternative to parenting, many of these children do not leave the child welfare system until they have aged out.

If I had lovingly placed my child for adoption and later found my child's face plastered on the internet with an advertisement under the picture, I would be devastated. The children are listed like job postings with dates to track updates. How would you feel to see your child's picture posted for months or even years?!

Please don't misunderstand me, I realize the intentions are very good. Anything that helps the child to be adopted... I just wonder if this affects the dignity of the children involved. Please let me know what you think.

Pouring Rain

Besides for the death of my grandmother, the month on August began far more eventful than I would have hoped for. On the Sunday before the funeral, my cousin was rushed to the ER via ambulance after what appeared to be a seizure. Three aunts and an uncle were nearly killed in an accident when the driver fell asleep at the wheel. I also learned that a good friend of our was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer. She's in her early 40's. This all happened in one day.

A couple of days earlier, I was told that the father of a long time friend was in ICU because of a serious stroke. As I was preparing to return home, the phone at my parents' home rang, and along with it came news of the death of a cousin of ours. She had just returned home from our family reunion. No one knew she was sick.

For me, this was a trying time. While it has been a time of transition and good things for our little family unit, my extended family has undergone some challenges and tragedies. When it rains, it pours. Matthew 5:45 tells us that it rains on the just and the unjust, so I cannot decide that these circumstances are sent as punishment. While that may sometimes be the case, each difficult circumstance is an opportunity for growth. At times it is a sign, and changes are needed. Continue to pray for my family and friends. The month had a rough start, but God is still on His throne, and He has not left us.

Loss

My life has been a whirlwind of activity lately. For those of you who know me personally, you may know that I lost my last living grandparent last week. My grandmother was a constant presence in my life, and I already miss her dearly. Although she had been ill for some time, her death was still a shock. She seemed to be improving. The grieving began quickly as the tears began to flow.

My mother was devastated. Both of her parents are gone now. Her pain was palpable, and comforting her was a challenge. But thank God for the ultimate Comforter we find in the Holy Spirit.

So, I thank each of you for all of your kind words and thoughts and prayers. I have felt the warmth of your love envelop me. I have not felt alone. Thank you for your kindness.

I also have so much to say my experiences with my extended family over the last 2 weeks. Whew! Stay tuned...

Just For Fun

On Friday night, hubby and I went out with friends to dinner and a show. We sent the children to a babysitter and everything. I have to admit that I was giddy with excitement during the days leading up to it. My anticipation must have been contagious because my daughter's summer camp teacher told me to have fun when I went to pick her up. Apparently she had been talking about it all day.
Although I was tired from working and rushing around, we had a wonderful time at dinner and the show. On top of it, our children also had a wonderful time. So I learned something that evening: FUN IS NOT OPTIONAL. Couple time is necessary for every healthy relationship. I know this is not a revolutionary discovery, but for me it is.
With a full-time job, a husband, two young children and one on the way, I often find myself stretched in too many directions. I'm committed now to spending less time crunching numbers, and more time having fun. Kids need no reminders. Now neither do I.

Blood Thirsty

During a bout of sleeplessness the other night, I woke up and saw something strange on TV. A man was taking a drink from some other guy's arm. Yes, you heard me right. I had no idea what I was watching. I still don't know what it was. I do know, I found it disturbing. The other thing that caught me off guard was a bizarre ritual some woman was performing. She was apparently a vampire and was summoning some powers from somewhere and causing party goers to dance provocatively and perform other immoral acts.

It's clear I caught the tail end of some vampire series, but as usual, I started thinking. Is there a spiritual aspect of vampires? Are there any ramifications for believers who watch these shows? My questions are based on the uneasy feeling I was left with after just a short time watching. I also wonder about the erotic nature of these beings. I've begun to do research and plan to learn more as time progresses. With the popularity of shows such as True Blood and Twilight, I think this is a topic in need of exploration.

Still Going...

Lately I've been feeling very pregnant. My body is changing rapidly, and my energy level is waning. Every day tasks require so much effort, and sciatica makes walking feel like torture at times! The 90+ temps and rain forest humidity levels make swelling inevitable. Breathing is challenging, and the so-called pregnancy glow just looks like overactive pores to me! But enough about the joys of pregnancy.

My precious daughter is coming along famously. She is very active, and has the same silly personality as he older sister and brother. I'm so excited to meet this precious child. In spite of the uncomfortableness of being pregnant in very hot weather, I still feel extremely blessed. I am dreaming about how my 3 children will interact with each other. How will this little girl look? What will she weigh at birth? What day will she be born? And after how many hours?! I enjoy sharing this with all of you. For those who have requested pictures, I'll have to think about that. No one tells a pregnant woman the truth about her appearance for fear of setting off a torrent of hormones! Although this fear does not seem to affect my oldest brother...

Baby Update

We've now entered our six month of pregnancy, and our little girl is rockin' and rollin'. She's a very active little munchkin. And according to pictures, very cute! But I'm slightly biased:) We are very grateful and excited.

While I'm very thrilled about the impending birth of our next child, I must say pregnancy changes as one gets older. Six years ago when our older daughter was born, it was a novel thing. When I was tired, I just took a nap. When I had a headache, I did the same. Now as a working mom of two, things are different. I don't have time to relax much. I can barely keep up with how far along I am! However, the anticipation of my older children makes it so much more fun.

Ironically, I'm watching MTVs 16 and Pregnant while I write this. This girl is pregnant and has since split from her "stalkerish" boyfriend. She is so not ready to be a parent. She does not want to breastfeed because she is worried about her boobs sagging more. She doesn't realize that pregnancy alone will do that to you. She's also arguing with her mom that having a baby won't be so hard since they don't do anything! Wow!

Knowing the stresses that have come along with being pregnant, I can't imagine doing it as a child. My mind has been taxed so much. My emotions are all over the place. I'm exhausted and oft times overwhelmed. Thank God for my husband and children. They support me and keep me going. I hope this show helps teens examine one major possible consequence of premarital sex. The time for sugar-coating is over.

Permanently Crippled

"At some point people have to throw off the wounds of their childhood or go through life permanently crippled." Fancy Pants by Susan Elizabeth Phillips.

While listening to this audio book, I was struck by the monumental charge given here in such a concise statement. Here the feminine lead is imploring the male lead to stop making excuses and live up to his potential.

There is no person, no matter how amazing the childhood, who will escape scars from this time period. When we live in the past with old hurts and slights, we cannot grow. As the author stated, we will be permanently crippled. I know that forgiveness is hardest when the offender is close to you.

If you are still holding a grudge against your parents or another loved one who wronged you, I challenge you to ask God to empower you with the ability to forgive so that you may walk in His joy. May your chains be loosed and your "legs" begin to walk.

Forgiving a Cheater

When a spouse cheats, many lives are changed irrevocably. Lately, infidelity has been gracing the pages of magazines and television headlines. While I have no idea what is wrong with these men, I'm more curious about the women beside them. While I know women cheat, I'm focusing mostly on men because they're the ones saturating the media right now.

The numbers of men in high-powered, influential positions who have devastated and demoralized their wives lately is fascinating to me! What I find even more amazing is the fact that the wives, more often than not, stay right there. Whether standing beside him as he fakes a tearful public apology or trying hard to smile in dignity as she publicly appears with him at a social event, the wives "stand by their man". My question is, "WHY?"

I don't stand in judgment of these victimized women. I feel sorry for them. I hate that they married men who are so cowardly that they cannot tell their wives in private before news of his infidelity is scrolling across CNN during the nightly news. I hate that the father of their children is barely fit to breathe, let alone be an example for their sons. I do wonder why women blame themselves for affairs. Why do they ask what short comings they have that caused their husbands to cheat? Why do they put up with it?

I have often argued with my husband that men will drop a cheating wife like a bad habit, and women will actually beg the cheater to come back to them?!

So that is my question to each of you: Are women more likely to reconcile with a cheater than men? If so, why do you think so? I would love to hear your thoughts. Don't leave me hanging!

Pick Your Battles

Someone please teach me what this saying means. I thought I knew. But lately everything seems to be a battle worth fighting. My question of the day is this: How do you turn the other way when it seems the only thing that matters is money? Any suggestions would be helpful. Many times I feel powerless to change things when I know they should change. Is praying enough or do I need to take action? I'll be waiting!

I Wanna Be a Shot

On the way to summer school, I was having my usual morning conversation with my little ones. This particular day we were discussing dental hygiene, specifically cavities. My precious daughter started asking questions about the process of fixing cavities. I told her that the doctor will numb your gums with a shot first and then drill into the tooth. She asked me if the shot would hurt. I told her it would hurt, but it was necessary to keep you from feeling the drill. She then said to me, "Mommy, I wanna be a shot cuz a shot hurts everything, but nothing hurts it." That struck me.

My daughter is terrified of shots. Her last well-child check-up was plagued with tears caused by anticipating a shot. The fact that she would want to be one tells me that she is starting to get a taste of what life can do to you. To her, a shot is invincible. Impenetrable. It was a hard statement for me to take as a mom.

She's been dealing with an older child with anger problems who doesn't keep her hands to herself. To date the child has punched her and slapped her in the face. I'm sure you can all imagine the self-control I've needed to use just to look at that girl each day without glowering. I admit that I haven't been that successful. My daughter is dealing with looking different. Having different hair.

I guess sometimes Jesus is our shot. Sometimes He numbs the pain. Other times He simply takes the edge off and helps us get through the process. Like earthly parents, our heavenly Father cares about our hurts. At times He must sit back and allow us to learn a lesson. Other times He intervenes. But always He is there to hold us in the end.

Republicans are Christians

When George W. Bush was elected to a second term, I remember hearing a popular slogan in churches and throughout the Christian media outlets: "Vote the Bible." Hmmm. Hold that thought.

In this most recent election, I heard Christians saying that they had to vote according to their convictions. Hmmm.

So recently, I've been thinking. According to Politico.com, Senator John Ensign of Nevada recently resigned from his post after news of his extramarital affair surfaced and scandals swirled around it. This same article references Sen. Larry Craig's involvement in a sex sting 2 years ago. And still again Sen. David Vitter was caught up in a prostitution ring! Most recently South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford was caught in a lie as news of his adulterous affair with a woman from Argentina surfaced.

Besides for being men without self-control or respect for their wives, what else do these men have in common? Give up? They are all Republicans. Why does this matter? Here's why. For years, Christians have associated Republicans with morality. Based upon abortion views and gay marriage primarily. My problem is that Christians actually believe one party is more moral than the other. Since when do politics and Christianity go together?

The danger with placing ourselves on a moral pedestal is just this. Each of these Republican leaders is guilty of sexual sins. Are these sexual sins equal to or better than homosexual sex? Is it better to be in a heterosexual marriage and cheat or to be in a gay relationship and be faithful? Christians have placed themselves in a position to be ridiculed by the masses. People do not take us seriously. By saying things like "Vote the Bible", we imply that "our" candidate is like a representative of Christ. Dangerous.

To be Republican officials, these men are required to say that they agree with the staples that make up their party's platform. While I do not advocate abortion or gay marriage, I do believe abortion will be legal until the end of time, regardless of the party in office. I also believe gay marriage will become legal. I'm not sure if voting for a candidate for what they say they believe is enough. Who cares, if they don't change anything?

For those of you who are angry with me, let me make a couple of statements. I do not think Democrats are Christians either. An individual may be a Christian, but not the party. Pretending to be a believer is very lucrative because Christians are often gullible. I do not believe presidents are representative of the Bible in any way. I do not believe we have a Christian country either. I'm not sure where that idea comes from. I am also NOT implying that these men are anything but human. Christians commit these same sins. My point is that, in my opinion, the church should not be affiliated with a party. I'm sure you all have something to say, and I am actually looking forward to hearing it.

Cheap Thrills

We've all heard the phrase, you get what you pay for. I've been hearing it a lot from my husband, lately. We've been arguing over the cheapness of the headphones I buy. Just because I bought $3 earphones that required a $5 check to be sent in with the warranty disbursement... Anyway. So I realize that certain things are worth paying more for. In most instances, the less expensive items are of a lesser quality. With one exception...

Many years ago, someone offered me a "gift" for free. I always want to know what the catch is when something is free. You can't get something for nothing, right? The gifts that seem too good to be true usually are. This one promised to meet all of my needs. To comfort me and never leave me. And as if this wasn't enough, it offered forgiveness of sins and eternal life! In a kingdom with golden streets! Seriously? Yep. Too good to be true? Absolutely. But it really is free. Since you can't earn it or pay for it, I guess you don't get what you pay for. Thankfully. Just accept it. It's a steal.

Follow Me

For y'all who have been hanging in there with me through this pregnancy, thank you. I mean it. I love you all. I know my writing has been more sporadic. Trust me, my intentions are good. I will still write, but since it's not as regular right now, I would ask each of you to follow this blog on the link provided. Then when I write, you''ll be notified, and you won't be frustrated as much, hopefully.

I look forward to chatting with you more. I enjoy sharing with you and having you allow me into tiny corners of your world. I appreciate the privilege you've given me. Please share with others if you are enjoying my musings. If not, please share with me. Tell me what you'd like to talk about. Express your dislikes and concerns, too. May God bless each of you abundantly according to His riches.

Present Uterus

As you all know, we're expecting another baby. So we're thrilled and feeling so blessed. Well, lately I've been feeling more pregnant lately. My ears have been plugged, my sciatic nerve has been wreaking havoc on me! At times it's tempting to ignore the rhythmic wiggling in my womb and focus on the pain that sometimes encompasses me.

Today at work, I received a reality check. I noticed a pediatric patient with the diagnosis: ABSENT UTERUS. Whoa. How many times do you take your uterus for granted? How many of us complain about that time of the month? Another young patient had amenorrhea, the absence of a cycle. How often do we just assume that we will get pregnant exactly when we want to? We test time and believe the eggs will produce when called upon. If that doesn't work, just buy eggs or get a surrogate. But I digress.

My point is that a uterus is a blessing. So is the dreaded monthly cycle. Without them, we cannot become mothers. For me, motherhood is filled with highs and lows, joys and pains. So today, I'm so thankful for my uterus. Our uterus also provides another blessing! Use your imagination. Sorry male readers, but if you have little ones, you are thankful for a uterus, too!

Watermelon Poisoning

At the time it seemed like a good idea. I ate a very filling dinner. Satisfying. Hard to come by during pregnancy. My mom insisted the watermelon was like nectar from heaven. So I gave in. I got a piece and plopped down on the couch. Now I feel like I've been to a taxidermist. I'm stuffed like a Christmas goose. Who knew fruit could make you feel like this? I know this is random, but I had to share. Now I must go and figure out why my "sleeping" children are having such a loud conversation!

Dental Farce

Hurry! Brush your teeth! Brush them again! Yes, you do need to floss. Use mouthwash too. Let me see. Ok, looks good.

You know what day it is. It's time for us to get our 6 month cleaning. Can't have the dentist seeing plaque and tartar build-up. I became a drill sergeant while getting them ready for the dentist. I even made myself brush a little longer while being sure to floss in spite of my pregnancy induced super sensitive teeth and gums.

The dental check-ups went well, but I started thinking. I felt like I dodged a bullet since I had no cavities. I started wondering why I don't take the extra time required during pregnancy to avoid problems. Why do I expect positive results without the effort?

The parallels between oral hygiene and the rest of my life were striking. So I'm making an effort to live every day like I'm going to the dentist. Why put on a show just because someone will see what I've been doing? Since God is the Master dentist, he knows how I act each day. He knows my heart and all of my habits. He helps me weed out the cavity causing behavior. I can't fool Him with by brushing more. Why try?

Picture Perfect

On Saturday I spent a glorious day at the NC Zoo with my family. My mom and my brother's family also joined us. I waited with eager anticipation as the day grew closer. With days in the 90s, I was a little concerned about the heat. Then we experienced torrential downpours, so I fretted about being drenched.

When it comes to zoos, I'm kind of obsessive. I'm as bad as a little child! As the big day grew closer, I kept an eye on the forecast. The weather was expected to be 83 degrees, partly cloudy. Perfect! I was thrilled and so thankful.

Saturday morning, we slept a little later than I wanted to. Ooops. Once we got outside, the weather was actually a little cool. Our drive was uneventful. We arrived at Africa and began our adventure. With video/digital camera in hand, I was ready to go.

At the end of the day, I was left with sore feet
and back, tired children, a happy husband and
enough memories to last a lifetime. I have some
amazing pictures of God's creations. I only wish I
had trusted Him enough to answer
my prayers for perfect weather.
He always answers.

Instant Christian?

When we celebrated our daughter's birthday, the party, naturally, spilled over to our house. While relaxing on the couch, my sister-in-law picked up one of my mags. Today's Christian Woman has been one of my faves for several years. When she looked at the cover, she said, "Why is she on the cover of a Christian magazine?"

She is Kate Gosselin of Jon and Kate Plus 8. So this got me thinking. Why the shock about this cover model? Then I thought back to when I first received the issue - I had the same question. I never knew that she professed Christianity. I did read the feature, and she said all of the right Christian things, so she checks out, I guess. Maybe not.

According to Matthew 7:15-20, the way we tell a true believer is by the fruit they bear. With this in mind, no person should be surprised to learn that a person is a Christ follower. Celebrity is not an excuse to hide our beliefs. Neither is a job. While we must follow rules about solicitation and proselytizing, we can still boldly represent Christ through our lives.

The question for me is why Christians are so desperate to sell magazines or gain publicity that they are willing to put any random person who says the word Jesus on the cover of a magazine? This is not written in judgment of Mrs. Gosselin. I don't know what she believes. Kate Gosselin is not being singled-out. There have been others on the cover that have made me wonder how or why they were chosen.

However, I would rather see an unknown woman who has constantly shown her love for Christ and others everyday, than an overhyped celebrity who accidentally spoke Christ's name and was catapulted to instant Christian. It is a privilege to be called a follower of Christ, therefore we should use caution when bestowing that title.

This pic is from her blog.

Yours is Bigger Than Mine

Cursing. Lying. Cheating on a test. Bootlegging movies. Making personal copies at work. Tax evasion. Cheating on a spouse. Child abuse. Incest. Rape. Murder.

Christians were placed here on earth to judge everyone. We have so many causes. Condemn those who abort. Treat the poor like dirt. Abolish same-sex unions. The list is endless. There's a tiny problem with this plan though. We are not without blame. Therefore, we cannot blame. Hmmm.

Says who? The Son of God. John 8:7 gives us a glimpse into the mind of the religious teachers and Pharisees. There was a woman who was caught in an adulterous act. Since Moses' law required her to be stoned, they decided to ask Jesus what they should do. The scripture says they were trying to trap Him so they'd have an offense against Him. He simply told them that the one without sin should throw the first stone.

There really isn't any gray area here. Since we are not without sin, we are to cast NO stones. If we look carefully, we will see that He does not refute the law, He simply showed them how ill-equipped they were to judge her. She was no more or less of a sinner than they.

The same is true for us today. We are actually sinning by condemning others. This does not mean that we overlook sins. However, we should examine ourselves and our motives before casting stones at another. Sins do not have levels or degrees. But for God's grace, we would all be lost. Condemned to hell forever.

My challenge for myself is to judge ME whenever I get thew urge to judge another. Doesn't it feel good to say, "Well I did this, but at least I didn't do that." We are always comparing in a feeble attempt to make ourselves feel better. May God help me to turn that energy inward and examine my own heart and life instead. I think I'll start with negative thoughts... Or maybe complaining... Or maybe complacency... This could take a while!

Unsportsmanlike Conduct

I "witnessed" the Cavaliers disgraceful defeat by the Magic on Saturday night with a house-full of family. At the end, I sighed with relief. It's not that I wanted them to lose, especially being a native Ohioan, but I was tired of the hype. I've been a part of the inconsistent thrill-ride with Cleveland sports for so long. They just have a way of disappointing. I'm just not die hard enough, I guess.

What caught my attention was the lack of post-game interview by the star Lebron James. Donned King James by some person unknown to me, he's been in front of the camera throughout his career. After this defeat, he performed a magic trick and disappeared from sight. It was very noticeable. SportsCenter seemed to notice, too. Questions were asked.

So I asked a couple of my own. Why did he skip the interview? My first thoughts are that he was embarrassed and angry. I believe that to be true. Then I wondered if that was the right thing to do. When you are paid millions of dollars to do a job, do you get the blow off the fans and refuse an interview?

Personally, I'm not a fan of many athletes or celebrities. It's not "hating", as my brother would say, but I simply feel they act like spoiled brats. They have more money and possessions than any of us could ever dream of, but they whine like tired infants. I believe that they have certain responsibilities based upon their blessings. Because, whether or not they acknowledge the source of their wealth, God allowed it. Because of this, they should act with class. To whom much is given, much is required. Luke 12:48

Are we asking a lot for them to submit to inquiries and pictures? After all, without the interest of fans, they would be broke like the rest of us. I personally don't feel sorry for them. The lifestyle is a chosen one. None of them would be willing to give it up to live like every man, so suck it up. So there.

God of the Rain

Here in sunny NC, we've experienced more than a week of somewhat flooding rains. Recently the rains subsided and allowed our cherished sun to grace our skies again. I'm not a girl who loves the rain unless I'm in the house, looking out while curled on the couch with a book. Since I can't remember doing that since I was 14, you can say the rain was a slight inconvenience.

Preparing for an outdoor party was also a challenge. I looked at the forecast ahead and realized the rain was expected to cease in time for the festivities. So while bemoaning the rains, I began to reminisce about the previous summer. The rains refused to fall. Washing our car was a luxury. Brown grass was "all the rage". The colorful flowers needed so much watering that I felt sorry for them having to be outside!

So with those memories, I realized that God is not only the God of the sunshine. He is the God of the rain. His hand is evident whether the sun shines or the rain falls. We just need to look for it. As people, especially Americans, we're used to focusing on how things inconvenience us and on what we want. I watched on the news as strawberry farmers lost valuable crops because of the torrential downpours. I lost nothing. I actually gained green grass! All seven blades of it!

For my life lesson, the sun represents happiness for me. The times when life is great, and all is going well. The rain reminds me of trouble. Maybe sadness or devastation. But that's wrong. For God is the God of both. During storms, I learn so much. While it often hurts, I come out better, looking more like the Father. Matthew 5:45 tells us that God "sends rain on the just and unjust alike." Rain is not a symbol for hard times, neither is sun proof that all will go well. Remember, you cannot see a rainbow until after the rain.

Precious Blessings

Yesterday I was blessed to spend an entire day at my 6 year old's school. There was a luau taking place and parents were invited to help out or simply enjoy the fun. I'd contemplated taking the day off to join in the festivities. For those of us mothers with careers, we are well aware of the balancing act between work and family. Since we are currently short staffed and overworked, I considered those facts also. So, in the end, I decided to follow my heart and help out, and I have no regrets.

I had an opportunity to laugh a lot. I saw my child in silly outfits and listened to her sweet voice over the throng of the others as they sang to us. She smiled so much, and was so happy to look out and see her parents and grandmother in the crowd. I am overjoyed that I was there. My little girl is truly a blessing. My family is truly probably the greatest reminder that God cares about me. Anytime I am tempted to forget that, I can look at my little ones.

I've noticed my own theme of blessings lately. It wasn't planned, but I guess it's the overflow from my heart. Every day we are faced with choices. Sometimes they are life and death. Others simply leave us with regrets if we choose the wrong way. In this case, I'm so thankful that I made the right choice. I'm thankful that I had a choice. I noticed several children without parents they and realized that perhaps they were not permitted to take time off.

There are many people who do not favor women working. I'm not here to argue with them. I am willing to say that wives are placed as helpers for her husband. Is is not possible that this help often comes in the form of employment? Staying at home has pros and cons for all parties involved. They are not clear cut. It is important that women respect and support each other regardless of how we take care of our families. Whether we stay home, work part or full-time.

A Face for the Feelings

If you're wondering why I did not write yesterday, I have a good excuse. Yesterday, we got a chance to see our unborn baby. I now have a face to go with the wiggly movements I've been feeling. It was amazing. The sheer wonderment never ceases, no matter how many times I've been here before. If I wasn't a bum, I'd try to scan in pics for you all to see. For now, imagination will have to suffice.

The perfectly crafted spine, the symmetrical cranium, the life-giving blood flow, the wonderful complement of ten fingers and toes. All seen in spectacular detail. Our children and my mom shared in this with us. What a blessing. Watching the fascination in the eyes of our little ones as they "met" their new sibling for the first time warmed my heart.

I do not take for granted the clean bill of health given to our baby. No abnormalities seen on the ultrasound. Thank you God! The organs are beautiful. The bones are long and straight. As one who sees anomalies on a daily basis, I have untold knowledge of the various things than could go wrong. So tonight I'm overjoyed. The melodious sound of my baby's heartbeat echoing in my ears... God's little rainbow of promise to me.

Marriage Miracle

This month, my husband and I celebrated 9 years of marriage. While the time has gone by quickly, it surely hasn't been easy all the time. I realize that we are blessed. Now, more than ever.

During this past week, I have watched Facebook statuses change from single to married, from married to "it's complicated", and from married to single. What a busy couple of days. As usual, I started thinking.

What makes a marriage fall apart? Was it gradual or in the blink of an eye? At times it's a series of betrayals. Perhaps there is infidelity at the root. Often couples say that they have just "fallen out of love"?

When analyzing my own marriage, I notice the biggest holes when our spiritual connection is unacceptable. Distance expands into a gulf than seems impassable. At times, you feel helpless and afraid of what tomorrow will bring. When financial difficulties are looming, the stress level takes a toll on our union. When our children are placed too high on our list, the strain is evident. So why do couples stay together in spite of hardships? I have no idea.

We love each other, but I honestly don't think it's a prerequisite to marriage. At times, we stay because we said we would. I'm thankful for the promise and the covenant we have together. I'm glad that God is the third strand. I'm glad to be married. Still. I can't take our time together for granted. Each day is a blessing. Each year a milestone. My marriage is worth protecting and holding on to.

I'm also praying for those with new marriages, those in crisis and those that have ended. God is the Father who cares enough to hold us through the hardest times. Thank you.

Nude Baby Bump

Since this is my third child, I'm struggling with finding a creative way to commemorate this pregnancy. With the first, we had a photo session. The second, my mom and I created a belly cast. So why not do a nude photo shoot this time?! Wrong! Not ever going to happen.

But, it seems I'm in a minority with this thinking. Someone showed me a website for a metropolitan photographer who specializes in family and maternity photos. The picture contained partial frontal nudity for the woman and rear nudity for the man. Why?

I'm a firm believer in the beauty of pregnancy, but I'm still the same woman. If I won't take nude pics without a baby bump, why does the bump make it acceptable? The pictures I saw showed far more than the belly. When does nudity transcend from porn to art?

In the Closet

In the closet. On the down low. Undercover. When most people hear these terms, homosexuals come to mind. When I hear them, I think of myself. Why? Of course I'll share.

This week I challenged myself to return to work with an attitude Christ could be pleased with. It hasn't been easy. There has been so much drama lately, that I dread going in the door. Honestly, some days I've had to talk to myself and say,"shut-up" a lot.

So today, I thought, " If I am a representative of Christ on this earth, is that a plus or a minus? Or would He be better off if no one knew? If I stayed in the closet?" The thought was startling. I remember deciding years ago that I could never have a Jesus fish on my car, because I suffered with a bit of road rage!

All day I've been wondering about whether or not I should be undercover. When people know you're a Christian, they expect things. Often they expect unrealistic things. Perfection. It feels like they want to catch you doing wrong. So today, I want to "come out." I want to live in a way that I can be proud of. More importantly, I want God to be proud that I'm His. Please pray with me.

Have you given a heifer today?

During the holiday season I received a catalog in the mail with a cow on the front. I seriously thought it was a joke. When I read the title Heifer International, I wasn't sure what to think! Instead of throwing it away, I decided to look inside strictly out of curiosity. It is an organization that helps to transform villages and communities through gifts of livestock.

The initial recipient may be given a pair cows. When the pair mates, a calf will be given to someone else until everyone has enough to sustain them. The ultimate pay it forward. I'd never heard of it before and was quite skeptical. Donations can be sent in your name, and you can give this gift to a family in need. I thought it was too good to be real, so I ignored it.

Fast forward to now. I was discussing women's affairs with a co-worker, and she mentioned the Heifer organization. I couldn't believe it. So someone else has heard of it! We talked a little more, and she brought me in an article about the group written by Barbara Kingsolver. The article was about a young widow in Nepal.

It is the story of poverty and isolation. She is an outcast. Her life is filled with drab colors. Red is not the color for a woman whose husband has died. Not only are the women of Nepal subject to these principles, they also carry them out. It was her mother-in-law who made sure she was not wearing red and that she was ostracized. This was the way of life. The Heifer organization changed this village and helped heal their jaded points of view.

Through empowering the women to be self-sufficient, they learned to take care of each other in the process. They learned to care for the animals and pass along off-spring. They learned to be inclusive instead of exclusive. They learned to receive as well as give. So now, instead of searching for meaningless gifts for birthdays and anniversaries, why not give a heifer? Or a goat or pigs?

How God Used Facebook

My husband had a wonderful best friend when we met. They were like brothers and made me laugh! When he said he was getting married, we were thrilled and excited to meet his bride. We all hit it off. They moved out of the country, and we all lost touch.

Many times over the years, I've harassed my husband to try and track them down. I've missed them and wished, maybe even prayed, we'd find them. Then, out of the blue, my husband received message on Facebook. There he was. They live only an hour away from us! All because of Facebook and some divine intervention.

Let's Dance: My thoughts

When I first read this article, I was so shocked. It just really seems a little over the top to me. The kid went to the prom! He did not make a bomb or fight a teacher. Just let it go. Then I read a little deeper...

There were rules in place. Consequences for each action. The young man admitted that he knew there was a good chance that he would be punished, and he chose to go anyway. He made a choice. Life is all about choices. Whether or not I agree with the extreme rules the school has, they were in place. Sure there may be loopholes. The rules only apply at school, or any number of other things. In spite of how this makes Christians look, I believe there is a big picture.

This young man is 17. Old enough to make decisions. Ready to launch out into the world. Filled with important, life-altering decisions to make. We are often forced to submit to the powers that be. Our rights and feelings are usually not taken into consideration. I believe the parents should have discussed the options and the potential consequences. Missing graduation and not being able to take finals is pretty severe. I believe the bigger lesson is making choices and accepting the consequences. Suing the school seems to send a poor message. That's just how I see it.

Let's Dance

Tyler Frost, an Ohio high school senior, was recently suspended, according to a Yahoo story. He is not permitted to take his finals on time, and subsequently will not graduate with his classmates. Pretty steep punishment. If you're like me, you want to know what this delinquent boy did to deserve this sentence. Trust me, there were no bomb scares or threatening others. He danced.

I listened to an interview the young man gave to CBS's The Early Show. The gist of the story is that the kid attends a Heritage Christian School in Findlay,OH. He received an invitation from his girlfriend to attend her prom at another school. He needed permission from his principal. It is apparent that Frost knew there was a chance he would not be allowed to graduate if he went. The school is said to have a policy against dancing.

During the interview, Frost stated that he enjoyed himself and feels it was worth the risk. He also believed the school's policies should not apply to activities not on school grounds. When asked about his faith, he says that he still considers himself to be a Christian and lives by the principles he's been taught at his school. Another article from the Toledo Blade goes into more detail about the school's position. There's also a response to the media attention on the school's website.

I don't want to comment just yet. I would really like to hear from all of you and then engage in a dialogue. Please weigh in.

Mother

Today we celebrate mothers. I'm thankful to have mine. I'm also overwhelmed by the joy of being a mom myself. I saw a marquis today that stated, "A mother's love is second only to God's love." How very true that is. I have learned much about unconditional love from mothering. It's a requirement.

I have learned to see the sun on the cloudiest of days. I have 2 and a mini reminders of God's love for me. What a privilege to be a mom. What immense responsibilities. To all of you who are mothers, I hope your day was filled with joy and endless memories. To all of you who want to be mothers, may God give you your heart's desire according to His will. Happy Mother's Day.

Good Night

As the work week closes, I want to offer a brief thanksgiving to God for His strength. My adventures in prayer are going well. I made it to work without falling asleep at my microscope. My family was kept safe. My id badge still works! I have not been laid off. My unborn baby is wiggling! I have wonderful people around me. My mom is coming to visit this month. My anniversary is coming up. We're celebrating Mother's Day. My daughter's having a birthday. I'm free to worship where and how I choose. Anyway... Thank you, God.

God, I Need to Talk

At times talking to God feels impossible. If talking to Him feels impossible, waiting to hear His voice is painful! We have been praying to God for His guidance without feeling that we have any more of an idea. After a while we started to second-guess ourselves. What are we doing wrong? Are we not talking loudly enough?

Then two days ago, while looking for labels, I stumbled on a book that I've had for quite a while. Through the years and a couple of cross-country moves, it's been pushed to the bottom of the pile. Well, in the nick of time, God brought it to the top. It appeared almost like magic. Lord, Teach Me to Pray in 28 days by Kay Arthur.

I'm only 2 days in, but I'm feeling optimistic. Although I've been praying for years, perhaps my skills have gotten a little rusty. The author has begun by focusing on the references to pray in the Bible, and the specific prayers found their. There are discussions about how to pray and what to pray for.

I'm looking forward to sitting at the feet of Jesus through this study. Pray that I persevere and that I am radically transformed by the end of it. I know God can do it, and I believe He will. I will share when I finish. Anything that improves my communication with the Most High is alright with me!

Small Groups

We were learning about steps to improve our relationship with God at church yesterday. With pen in hand, I am armed to take meticulous notes. The first step was daily quiet time. No problem! My pen halted abruptly at step two, participate in a small group. What? Why? It isn't like we haven't heard this before. We were even a part of a couples small group before we had children. Over the years our conflicting schedules have made small group attendance extinct. Either there are no good times or no child care. But of course those are only the surface reasons for not going. Our reasons, although legit, are fostered by a basic distrust of church folks.

Growing up as a pk, I saw a lot in church. Much of it ugly. When you hear other Christians gossipping about their group members, you decide there is no point in setting yourself up for disappointment. I can get two-faced friends anywhere. So pastor said, "It's time to trust again." The statement spoke to me. I realized that perhaps it was, no is, my own expectations that set me up for failure. We're all human. Fallen and broken. We will sin. I need to stop judging and realize that Christians are saved by grace. So I'm searching for a group now and looking forward to new relationships.

Brain Dead

So lately I've been so distracted. For those of you who visit me regularly, you know I try to post consistently. Thank you, btw, to those of you who visit often. I really do appreciate it. Feel free to spread the word . But I digress. Anyway. I've had many things on my mind. Work. The new baby. The future. God's plan for me. My daughter's self-confidence. Traveling. You get the picture.

When this happens, my schedule gets all crazy. I simply forgot to write. So I'm just gonna share a little. This week has been hectic. Work has been hectic and stressful. I've been wondering when God will provide a ram in the bush. I would also like to help my daughter with her fears. At times she is so hesitant to try new or difficult things. I guess it bothers me because I feel that kids should be fearless. Most times I feel that I should do more, and the guilt of being a working mom takes its place in my psyche.

I've also, sadly, spent some time worrying about my unborn baby. While the pregnancy is progressing fine, I can't know right now if it's healthy and whole. I should not be concerned, but the geneticist in me knows too much info. With the previous loss, I'm a bit more paranoid. And while others are praying for me, I still struggle and ask God to forgive me for not trusting Him enough.

So now that you know a little about what's going on with me, maybe the picture is a little clearer. I will remind myself to focus and share my heart with each of you. For those that I know personally, I thank you for your friendship and support. For those that I do not, I thank you also and look forward to continuing our very long distance relationship. God bless you. May His grace and mercy smile on you. May His Light guide your footsteps as I know He will continue to guide mine also.

Quickening

If you've ever been pregnant, you know it can be overwhelming at times. In the beginning, you don't have much assurance that things are going ok. It's too early to feel movement, so you just have faith. Recently, when I was feeling a little unsure, I felt a little wiggle in my abdomen. Quickening. Baby's way of saying, "Don't worry mommy, I'm good." I needed it.

I think God does the same thing for me. At times, my spirit feels empty, and a scripture will pop into my head. My favorite song on the radio. A reminder that all is well. Assurance that He is in control. God's way of saying, "Don't worry, daughter, I'm good." Mommies need reassurance, too. "Taste and see that the Lord is good..." (Ps. 34:8)

Driving Scared

A few short days ago, I was driving into work. Everything was business as usual. I was talking to my mom on my Bluetooth headset, and navigating the highway. Then something happened... Suddenly I saw breaklights in my lane, and I realized the lane had come to a screeching halt. I knew there was no way I could miss the car in front, so I hit the breaks and decided to swerve into the median. As I did, 2 other cars starting coming over simultaneously. As I struggled to control my car and avoid the other drivers, I narrowly missed slamming into the wall. In fact, according to the officer, my left side went up onto it.

The fear I felt was immediate. I thought I was dead. I thought of my unborn baby. Once my heart rhythm slowed down, I offered thanks to God for saving our lives.

As the day went on, I began to access the damage. Not to my car, because I didn't care. My mind. I instantly thought of the time I've been wasting on meaningless things. I realized my mortality and the indefinite time I'm promised on this earth. That could have been my last day. Since God kept me, I take that to mean He is mercifully giving me more time to complete the tasks He's given me. Perhaps this was a wake-up call. I am committed to making every day count and to enjoying even the simplest things. I also know that my daughter's prayer for my safety was heard that day and so many more. Thank you, Lord.

Inseparable

While doing my current events check on the net, I tripped over this story about enduring love. This Kansas couple was married 67 years and died within hours of one another! My heart was feeling all oooey and gooey. I've always said that I would like for me and my hubby to die like the couple in the Notebook, lying together within seconds of the other, so neither of us has to endure life without the other. Something that struck me about the article was the couple's commitment to their church. That's so important. It's so good to see a marriage that ends as a result of natural causes and not death from a destructive divorce.

Never Give Up

Rita Levi Montalcini, an Italian born scientist, celebrates her 100th birthday today. She says her mind is sharper now than it was when she was 20! The Yahoo article highlights her accomplishments including a Nobel Prize for medicine.

"Above all, don't fear difficult moments," she said. "The best comes from them." She talks of being forced to stop studying at the university because of sanctions created by dictator Benito Mussolini in the 1930s. The article describes her perseverance to research in a makeshift lab in her bedroom!

She's an inspiration. In spite of difficult odds and in spite of the limitations placed upon her due to gender and ethnic background, she is still going strong. With her snow-white crown of hair, she still addresses audiences. How incredible. If she can follow her dreams in the face of these circumstances, we have few excuses not to pursue the course God has laid before us.

Photo courtesy of jollyroger

Somewhat Disappointed (Possible Spoiler)

My husband and I have been anticipating our viewing of the movie Fireproof for quite a long time. After seeing all of the viewings at churches and the glowing reviews, we were prepared for cinematic magic. Unfortunately, I was disappointed. Now, before attacking me, please hear me out.

The storyline was pretty predictable, but I'm okay with that. I thought they did a fantastic job of shedding light on some of the problems in the couple's marriage. I enjoyed the banter and appreciated the racial diversity in the film.

Here's what I did not like. The husband had a porn addiction, while his wife participated in an emotional affair with a doctor she worked with. She is seen laughing and holding the hand of the doctor. She is spending too much time with him and seeking him out in the hospital. She doesn't even realize that he is also married! She never finds out.

The husband, at the behest of his father, takes a dare to try and save his marriage. He is repeatedly rebuffed by his wife throughout the process. It is quite realistic. While the husband ends up requesting forgiveness for his maltreatment of her over the years, she never does. That's my problem.

Bad marriages are rarely the fault of only one party. Although much of the spotlight was placed on his addiction and selfishness, there was also evidence of her indiscretions. Why then, did she not confess her emotional affair and repent to her husband? It could have happened simultaneously, but the writer chose to omit this. I actually think this was a huge mistake.

While the message of love was strong, I believe the message of forgiveness should be stronger. To me, the biggest message of God's love for us is His forgiveness. While forgiveness can be granted even if not requested, asking shows humility, and I believe it shows acknowledgment of a wrong. 1 John 1:9 speaks of first confessing our sins, then receiving forgiveness from God. Does it not apply to our spouse?

I don't want to knock the movie, because it had many wonderful components. It is definitely worth watching. I'm just drawing attention to a theme I thoughts should have been explored a little more deeply. As I've been married for quite a while, I realize the importance of forgiveness in my marriage. I understand the necessity of asking and granting forgiveness. I did read other reviews by Christians, and mine is not the only unfavorable one. If you've seen it, please let me know if think my reaction is over the top. Be honest.

The Best of Times

Recently a friend of mine posted a photo on Facebook and tagged me in it. This picture took me back almost 13 years ago to a time when the economy was good, and my life was pretty carefree. The image brought with it a rush of memories.

I enjoyed reading what everyone else wrote about the picture. The picture was taken on a camping trip that we took after graduation. It was filled with adventure and so much laughter. We got lost in the woods even though boy scouts were with us. We enjoyed food cooked over a campfire and the beautiful scenery of the water falls. I'm so thankful our parents trusted us enough to let us go.

It was one of the happiest memories of growing up. The beauty is that I has so many good friends that the great memories abound. I had the time of my life in junior high and high school. My friends were good people, and we did not get into trouble together. We had good clean legal fun. Movies and lots of eating. Some times just hanging out at one another's house or the Dairy Queen. I thank God for friends and for Facebook and amazing memories.

Distracted

Lately I've been so preoccupied. I've had so many random thoughts. My dreams have run amok. I don't know what God has next for us. My heart is to minister to women and girls. Besides for daily interactions, I just don't know where to begin. After praying and seeking God, I feel that I'm no closer to an answer.

At work, I've been mostly existing. I know it's not my calling, but it is a necessity right now. In this economy, a job is a blessing. Right now I am seeking God for renewed focus. Peace in the midst of uncertainty. Gratitude no matter what comes our way. Faith in the One who loves and cares for me unconditionally.