Thursday, May 21, 2009

In the Closet

In the closet. On the down low. Undercover. When most people hear these terms, homosexuals come to mind. When I hear them, I think of myself. Why? Of course I'll share.

This week I challenged myself to return to work with an attitude Christ could be pleased with. It hasn't been easy. There has been so much drama lately, that I dread going in the door. Honestly, some days I've had to talk to myself and say,"shut-up" a lot.

So today, I thought, " If I am a representative of Christ on this earth, is that a plus or a minus? Or would He be better off if no one knew? If I stayed in the closet?" The thought was startling. I remember deciding years ago that I could never have a Jesus fish on my car, because I suffered with a bit of road rage!

All day I've been wondering about whether or not I should be undercover. When people know you're a Christian, they expect things. Often they expect unrealistic things. Perfection. It feels like they want to catch you doing wrong. So today, I want to "come out." I want to live in a way that I can be proud of. More importantly, I want God to be proud that I'm His. Please pray with me.

3 comments:

Christina said...

You always have a positive attitude! You are sometimes the only positive thing at work! I just hope that I can have an attitude that Christ can be pleased with also. It's much easier for me since I am not in the middle of the drama like you. Sorry you have do deal with everything. I am praying things can get better.

Babetta said...

Thank you. I try, but I know I've been failing a lot lately. Things have to get better! We can pray together!

Christina said...

Absolutely we can pray together!!