Love in a Bottle

This morning I woke up to the sad news that another young Hollywood star was found dead in his hotel room after an apparent overdose.  My first thought was, "Another one?"  Then I remembered seeing his smiling, vibrant face on the screen.  I did not see the pain underneath, and it breaks my heart.  I shook my head and sighed as I read the news reports detailing a troubled star with stints in rehab.

Then I thought of those of us who long to emulate any and everything we see in Hollywood.  Celebrities are our role models.   We strive to be "real" housewives and keep up with the Kardashians.

There is little to no focus on the character of the individuals we admire.  We see only their beautiful cars and airbrushed faces and bodies.  We lust after their mega mansions and flashy jewels.  They have it all, so they're happy.  Right?

We seem to miss the EMPTINESS that abounds inside of so many celebrities.

All of us know what it feels like to struggle with emptiness.  It creates an ache inside, a pain so deep that we long for anything to help escape.  That longing compels us to seek solace in any and every form.  Sometimes that place is in a stranger's bed.  At times we look in the bottom of a bottle or in a container of pills.  Yet, peace is not found in those places for more than a few minutes.

True peace begins on the inside.  It is nurtured by the Holy Spirit and rooted in Jesus Christ.

As long as we are in denial of that fact, we will continue to search for elusive peace.  We won't find contentment at the end of a "cause".  We won't find it once we get the ring.  A baby won't do it.   Neither will a bigger house and a shiny car soothe our broken hearts.

Only the Man who loves our souls can heal our hidden places and bring joy.

Joy is better than happiness.

Peace is better than turmoil.

God's love is better than the rest.

No Such Thing as Freedom of Speech

As this political season heats up, I can feel my temperature rising.  I have never enjoyed election years, but so far, this one takes the cake.  The whining and mud-slinging are just plain annoying.

Oh, I'm not talking about the candidates, I'm referring to the voters.  There are those that take freedom of speech to new heights.  Our so-called freedom of speech is not meant to be a free-for-all of hate and disdain being volleyed back and forth like a shuttlecock.

Christians have a responsibility to share their views in ways that reflect Christ's love at all times.  This doesn't mean that we have to be soft on the ideals we hold dear, but we do need to consider our desired end result.  We should examine our hearts and motives carefully before jumping on a bad wagon or plastering our car bumpers with political paraphernalia.

Every word that comes out of our mouths has the potential to be a fiery dart.  Is it more important to point the lost to Christ or prove a fleeting point?   Freedom of speech may be a constitutional right, but is it a God-given right?  Scripture gives us many stipulations about the way we speak.  We don't have carte blanche.

We should stop deluding ourselves into believing that the world can't see through the thinly veiled hatred behind our words and deeds.  As the saying goes, "you catch more flies with honey..."  Not that people are flies, but you know what I mean.

So please, before you hop in your car and "eat mor chikin" or post your latest dig at "obamacare" or "r money", please ask God to give you the wisdom to love your neighbors first.  We have to make sure that we are not using God as a shield to hurt others or propagate our own twisted opinions.  The ultimate goal is to win another to Christ.  Let's not lose sight of that.

                                             "Speaking the truth in love..."  Ephesians 4:15

Babies Everywhere

If you've been reading for a while, you know I often have questions about the things that puzzle me.  I often wonder if I am the only one scratching her head when something odd crosses my radar.  So what am I wondering about today?  Pregnancy.  

No, I am not pregnant, nor do I want to be pregnant.  I have paid my debt to society and obeyed the command to "be fruitful and multiply" :)  What I am wondering about is whether or not you think pregnancy is sacred and about whether or not we encourage unwed pregnancies in our society.

Please don't think I am being a judge, because that is not my intention.  Often, a single, pregnant woman signifies the fact that she bravely chose to allow her baby to live instead of ending its life.  But that's not what I'm talking about today.

What made me ask these questions is the nude spread a very pregnant, single celebrity recently did.  The other is a photo of two very young, single women posing at a baby shower.

While I don't believe unwed mothers should be stoned or persecuted, I do wonder if the shame and stigma that used to be associated with bringing children into the world outside of marriage, is missing.  

Does the fear of being embarrassed help to deter us from making poor decisions?   If that is the case, are we glamorizing single mothers with many of the shows that we find on television now and the choices of celebrities?  Are we doing ourselves and our girls a disservice?  What do you think?

The Words We Speak

Yesterday yet another school shooting made national news.  A young man in Chardon, OH opened fire and changed the lives of many families in an instant.  The article I read said that the shooter dressed in a goth style and was teased for his appearance.  It also said that he kept his feelings inside.  Though I do not excuse his actions, I wonder how little emphasis we place on the words we speak to others.

Are we concerned that our hateful words may wound someone irreparably or contribute to such tragic incidences as this?  Do we value our own opinions more than the feelings of those we encounter?  Are we immune to the pain that our tongue can cause?

It is no wonder the Bible has so much to say about controlling our speech.  In James 3:3-10, the tongue is compared to a bridle and a horse and a ship's rudder.  Both are small components that perform the task of determining direction; just as our tongues are small organs that can inflict huge damage.

Sometimes we all have difficulty controlling what we say.  Sometimes hurtful things are said in anger, other times from carelessness.  It is necessary to confess our faults to God and not make excuses.  Contrition can lead to healing and help to prevent tragedies like this one.  Please pray for the families involved affected by this horrible tragedy.

'Til Death Do Us Part

Marriage and divorce are common occurrences in our country. The divorce rate is appallingly high, and many say that no one stays married any more. Gordon and Norma Yeager of Iowa recently died after more than 70 years of marriage. Imagine what they saw and the challenges that they faced during their time together. Any of us who is married knows that at times marriage can take you to your breaking point, but it doesn't have to end in divorce. In joy and trials, marriages are meant to be lifelong covenants with few exceptions. Let their story inspire you to hold on for dear life until God takes one (or both) of you home.

Gender Stereotypes

My sister by marriage posted this story on Facebook, and I'm dying to know what all of you think about it. I will reserve my opinions for a later time.

Dead Terrorist Parade

By now we have all gotten the news of Bin Laden's demise. There have been various responses to the news. Shock. Doubt. Elation.

The other day I saw people marching and cheering and chanting with glee over the death of the this creepy terrorist. Though I thought it odd, it never occurred to me that it might be wrong.

That's when I saw a post on Facebook from one of my favorite authors, Liz Curtis Higgs. She posted Proverbs 24:17. It says: " Do not gloat when your enemy falls; when he stumbles, do not let your heart rejoice." Ouch!

Kudos to her for her willingness to take this very unpopular stance. I, for one, appreciated the reminder. Following God's will for us is often unpopular, but He calls us to be set apart.

President Obama has also declined to release the graphic photos of the body and the site. I have heard people asking for them, but he too has taken a stand. He stated, "That's not who we are. We don't trot out this stuff as trophies." I can remember being disturbed by images of Saddam Hussein hanging while crowds jeered, and I am grateful we were spared this time.

I Hate Weddings

My heart is full this morning. As many of you may know, I hate weddings. It may seem odd that a woman hates weddings, but it's true. I hate them passionately. Here's why...

Once upon a time a wedding was a representation of something sacred. It was a symbol of the commitment before God and each other to work at a holy marriage together, forever. With a 50% divorce rate, we've clearly strayed away from that idea. Divorce is an acceptable option now, and it's expected. Few work at staying married, each too concerned with his own happiness over God's holiness. The ceremony is filled with false promises.

The other reason I hate weddings is the white dress and the veil covering the bride's face. Why is this done? A white dress is a symbol of virginity, and the veil signifies modesty and purity. Do I really need to elaborate? Well, I don't mind if I do.

Today Prince William married Kate Middleton. I saw her "lovely" white dress and virginal veil splashed over Yahoo, and I shook my head. They were away on vacation together when he proposed. They moved in together before the wedding, and with the blessing of the Archbishop! He justified giving his blessing because "modern" couples want to "try out the milk before buying the cow"! Click here for the complete article.

Why the veil? What are you covering when the groom has already sampled everything? Why the white? Are we to believe they've been sleeping alone? Instead of setting an example for all of the young girls watching, they bowed to modernity like so many others before. It's so sad that an archbishop would forsake the Bible and bless their choice.

I want my daughters and son to aspire to wear white honestly. Our society has taken away the meaning. Brides are secretly scoffed at when they choose to do so and haven't earned it. Others simply wear creme or champagne since savvy designers have declared white "outdated" and off white colors "chic". Weddings are about more than "tradition", and we should treat them as such. They should not be a show. One should not say vows before a God that they do not honor with their lives. It's not a requirement, is it?

I am not trying to be harsh, and I welcome your thoughts. I am not trying to be judgmental, as it is my intention to edify. But I do not apologize for speaking truth from God's word. We are commanded to do nothing less.

While fashion trends change, God word doesn't. Sex is to be reserved for marriage. Teaching anything less is to rob ourselves and our children of what married love is meant to be. We can not teach a gospel that follows trends and modern thought. That is faulty at the core. Our lives should conform to the Bible. It is time that Christians stand up and be an example. Let the white of our wedding attire represent the purity in our lives.

Photo from Charliesbridal.com

Unsportsmanlike Conduct

I "witnessed" the Cavaliers disgraceful defeat by the Magic on Saturday night with a house-full of family. At the end, I sighed with relief. It's not that I wanted them to lose, especially being a native Ohioan, but I was tired of the hype. I've been a part of the inconsistent thrill-ride with Cleveland sports for so long. They just have a way of disappointing. I'm just not die hard enough, I guess.

What caught my attention was the lack of post-game interview by the star Lebron James. Donned King James by some person unknown to me, he's been in front of the camera throughout his career. After this defeat, he performed a magic trick and disappeared from sight. It was very noticeable. SportsCenter seemed to notice, too. Questions were asked.

So I asked a couple of my own. Why did he skip the interview? My first thoughts are that he was embarrassed and angry. I believe that to be true. Then I wondered if that was the right thing to do. When you are paid millions of dollars to do a job, do you get the blow off the fans and refuse an interview?

Personally, I'm not a fan of many athletes or celebrities. It's not "hating", as my brother would say, but I simply feel they act like spoiled brats. They have more money and possessions than any of us could ever dream of, but they whine like tired infants. I believe that they have certain responsibilities based upon their blessings. Because, whether or not they acknowledge the source of their wealth, God allowed it. Because of this, they should act with class. To whom much is given, much is required. Luke 12:48

Are we asking a lot for them to submit to inquiries and pictures? After all, without the interest of fans, they would be broke like the rest of us. I personally don't feel sorry for them. The lifestyle is a chosen one. None of them would be willing to give it up to live like every man, so suck it up. So there.

Let's Dance: My thoughts

When I first read this article, I was so shocked. It just really seems a little over the top to me. The kid went to the prom! He did not make a bomb or fight a teacher. Just let it go. Then I read a little deeper...

There were rules in place. Consequences for each action. The young man admitted that he knew there was a good chance that he would be punished, and he chose to go anyway. He made a choice. Life is all about choices. Whether or not I agree with the extreme rules the school has, they were in place. Sure there may be loopholes. The rules only apply at school, or any number of other things. In spite of how this makes Christians look, I believe there is a big picture.

This young man is 17. Old enough to make decisions. Ready to launch out into the world. Filled with important, life-altering decisions to make. We are often forced to submit to the powers that be. Our rights and feelings are usually not taken into consideration. I believe the parents should have discussed the options and the potential consequences. Missing graduation and not being able to take finals is pretty severe. I believe the bigger lesson is making choices and accepting the consequences. Suing the school seems to send a poor message. That's just how I see it.

Let's Dance

Tyler Frost, an Ohio high school senior, was recently suspended, according to a Yahoo story. He is not permitted to take his finals on time, and subsequently will not graduate with his classmates. Pretty steep punishment. If you're like me, you want to know what this delinquent boy did to deserve this sentence. Trust me, there were no bomb scares or threatening others. He danced.

I listened to an interview the young man gave to CBS's The Early Show. The gist of the story is that the kid attends a Heritage Christian School in Findlay,OH. He received an invitation from his girlfriend to attend her prom at another school. He needed permission from his principal. It is apparent that Frost knew there was a chance he would not be allowed to graduate if he went. The school is said to have a policy against dancing.

During the interview, Frost stated that he enjoyed himself and feels it was worth the risk. He also believed the school's policies should not apply to activities not on school grounds. When asked about his faith, he says that he still considers himself to be a Christian and lives by the principles he's been taught at his school. Another article from the Toledo Blade goes into more detail about the school's position. There's also a response to the media attention on the school's website.

I don't want to comment just yet. I would really like to hear from all of you and then engage in a dialogue. Please weigh in.

Never Give Up

Rita Levi Montalcini, an Italian born scientist, celebrates her 100th birthday today. She says her mind is sharper now than it was when she was 20! The Yahoo article highlights her accomplishments including a Nobel Prize for medicine.

"Above all, don't fear difficult moments," she said. "The best comes from them." She talks of being forced to stop studying at the university because of sanctions created by dictator Benito Mussolini in the 1930s. The article describes her perseverance to research in a makeshift lab in her bedroom!

She's an inspiration. In spite of difficult odds and in spite of the limitations placed upon her due to gender and ethnic background, she is still going strong. With her snow-white crown of hair, she still addresses audiences. How incredible. If she can follow her dreams in the face of these circumstances, we have few excuses not to pursue the course God has laid before us.

Photo courtesy of jollyroger

Nothing Says I Love You Like a Busted Lip

On my way to the doctor, I observed a billboard containing those words. No explanation needed. It was followed by a hot-line number for domestic abuse.

With Rihanna and Chris Brown in the press, we have been inundated with domestic violence. Today's Christian Woman magazine is highlighting this topic for this year's cause.

In a previous issue, the focus was on a "Christian" violent marriage. When the couple involve profess Christianity, the situation becomes more complicated. Divorce is not an options for us, right? A little prayer and counseling will fix it all.

I've always wondered why a woman puts up with domestic violence. Why not leave? But I realize there is more than meets the eye. Mental, physical and emotional abuse are all so dangerous and debilitating. If you are in an abusive relationship, please get out. If you know someone who is, do not hesitate to help find help for her. Here are a few resources recommended by TCW mag:

www.theraveproject.org
www.peaceandsafety.com
www.ncadv.org
www.focusministries1.org
1-800-799-SAFE

Let's love ourselves and each other enough not to turn a blind eye to abuse.

Creative Reproductivity

There is a process know as PGD, or Preimplantation Genetic Diagnosis. It has been around for almost twenty years now, according to Wikipedia. The idea is that a couple undergoing IVF is able to "choose" which sex a child is before implantation. Since I am a scientist, I have always found this process fascinating, but I've always had concerns about the uses of this technology.

In my work, I often see the amnios of women who've undergone fertility treatments. The result is often multiples, and they frequently want genetic testing to search for sex and any abnormalities. If a child is the wrong sex, or has a genetic defect, they are often aborted. PGD will enable a couple to learn of these things before implantation occurs. Therefore producing a custom pregnancy, so to speak.

In the news, two clinics are boasting of there abilities to provide "designer" babies. You can now choose eye color, hair color and even height and intellect! The ethical implications are terrifying and unconscionable. Technology is a blessing that God gave us. In the wrong hands, this will be disastrous. Creation is God's alone. When doctors and parents play God, the results will be catastrophic.

Suspended

I won't say much because this topic is already getting too much airtime. However, I stumbled onto a great article about the slap on the wrist Phelps just received. A 3 month ban from swimming when he isn't actually swimming right now! If you're gonna take the time to punish someone, make it count. Otherwise, leave it alone. Click here to read the article written by Yahoo sports writer, Dan Wetzel.

Regarding the moral or social implications, here's a great blog post that wraps it up very succinctly.

As a mom of two young children, I strive very hard to be their role model. As much as I enjoyed Phelps' awesome run in China, I do not want my children looking to him or any other unknown person. And while I know they will be influenced by the media influx, it's my job to rear them, not celebrities and their manufactured personae. Let me know what you think.

I would love to hear from all of you.

Eight Babies and Counting

Recently a California woman gave birth to octuplets. Eight children at one time. Amazing. She has raised quite a stir. The mother, 33 year old Nadya Suleman, already has six children in her home, ranging in age from 2-7 years of age. She reportedly is unmarried and resides with her parents.

The woman's mother, Angela Suleman, recently spoke out against her daughter having so many children. Her children were all conceived through in vitro fertilization, or IVF. The grandmother says she always wanted babies.




There are also ethical questions being raised. Why was she implanted with so many simultaneously? There are apparently guidelines governing the transfer process of embryos. Who will support these children? Although she is college educated, she lives with her parents. She seemingly cannot support these children on her own. Not to say that many people can support 14 children without help.

I have children of my own, and I know they are a gift from God. The Bible encourages us to have children. (many times in the book of Genesis alone) My question is, have we gone too far? In previous years, when women could not have children, adoption was often the chosen remedy. While many believers do not believe in IVF (or contraception), I do not think all fertility treatment is wrong. I believe it is a blessing for families that would otherwise never be. If I had not conceived my children, I would have considered assistance.

My concern is when so many children are conceived, complications increase, for the mother and the babies. When multiple fetuses are in the womb, physicians routinely recommend "selective reduction." A sugar coated way of saying elective abortion. These children are not only aborted for defects but simply because there are too many or because a boy was wanted instead of a girl. There is an expected, increased loss of children associated with this process.

I definitely don't have any answers here, but I do think it makes for an interesting discussion and has given me a lot to think about. All life is precious, and the desire for children is from God. What we do with that desire is free will. No matter what, we are each responsible for our reproductive choices and should be sure they are in line with our Creator's plans. What do you think?