Together is Better than Separate

How do we impact a world filled with women who chase after things that only destroy them?  How do we influence a generation of women who love celebrities more than self-esteem?  How do we impact a population of women who use sex as currency and live with permanent scars because of it?  How do we divert a train wreck already in progress?

This is where my heart is this morning and always.  Why?  Because I have 2 daughters and 1 son who are growing up in this world filled with darkness and so little light.  Why?  Because I care, not only about my babies, but about yours too.

I can't just sit back and watch as their minds and hearts are destroyed by fabrications and misguided notions.

While searching for news this morning, I saw image after image of half-naked young women posed in provocative positions.  I found celebrity "marriages" and babies born outside of marriage.  I saw divorces and myriad other things to mourn.  These are the images that meet us when we turn on our televisions or log on to our computers.  They meet our daughters and sons as well.  And what do they say?

The images say, "This is what love looks like."

But this isn't true love.  It is impossible to positively influence our children if we don't FIRST address the holes in ourselves.  We have a responsibility to them and to ourselves and each other.  

If you are tired of having your daughters longing to emulate half-naked tweens, join me.  If you're tired of your friends using "real" housewives as role models, join me.  If you believe there is more to life than fame and fashion, join me.  If you want true love and peace in your life, join me.  

I believe in 2 or 3 (Matt. 18:20).

Together we can change the world:  Broken Rubies united for one cause.  Women with broken hearts and broken lives, joined together to embrace the priceless rubies within.  We are flawed women,  beautiful gems (TM). 

Please join me:

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Broken-Rubies/292572877457287

Virtual Beauty

Last week I stumbled into a mini firestorm.  Apparently real women are not en vogue right now for modeling.  The H&M clothing company has decided to use virtual models for swim suit and lingerie models.  They've been criticized heavily for this choice.  They were accused of "creating unrealistic physical ideals" by a Norwegian company in the ABC News article I read, while the company defends its position to simply show off the clothes.

What I'm trying to figure out is how this is any different from the live models that are usually used especially for these types of clothing?  My body doesn't look like a swimsuit model's, and I have no illusions that it does.  So if most women don't look like models, how is this affecting the self image of women any worse that live models?  Help me out.  Am I missing something.  Real of virtual?  Does it make a difference?

Broken + Rubies

Sin had us broken, cut-off from our Creator. Once we came to Him, we were required to subdue our own will and seek His will first. Out of our brokenness, He makes us beautiful.

He treasures us. We are precious; priceless and unique; rubies. He grants us His wisdom if we only seek it and follow Him. We are broken rubies.

Short, Slinky Spandex

How many of you find yourself comparing your appearance to others? I don't do this often, but I did it yesterday. What I'm sharing with you is deeply personal, so please handle it with kid gloves.

As you all know, I gave birth to our third child last year. Many people tell me that I look "great" or "you don't look like you've had three kids." I politely thank them and go on my way. While compliments are nice, they don't mean squat if you don't buy them.

Last night I attended my brother-in-law's wedding. So of course I was surrounded by young women with no husband and no children. Since Tre was in the wedding, I had the two younger children. The eldest was the flower girl, but became my charge after the ceremony. I did have some help from my sister-in-law and another one to be, but I they're lightweights! My kids wore us all out. They were tired and cranky, and I was almost to tears before it was all over. Anyway...

The waifs were everywhere. For the first real time, I felt like covering my gray hairs. I felt older and more tired and bigger than so many! It was a strange feeling for me, and I'm not sure why it hit when it did.

Perhaps it was the overly tight, overly short dresses were in huge supply. While I have never dressed like that, it was because of my morals, not because I couldn't pull it off. Now it's a little bit of both. Clothes cover a multitude of sins. Baby pouches are unglamorous, and when you hate crunches and love cheesecake as much as I, you may always have one! The other thing is that even though my scale tells me I am the same as I was before babies, the weight is distributed differently, and gravity is against me! I guess I can't be a convincing Catwoman this Halloween.

I guess it's a good thing I have a God that looks at me from the inside out and loves me anyway. If I decide to get serious about exercising, maybe I'll be the one in the short, slinky spandex at the next reception. Or maybe not.

Treasure

I received this from my girl Karen, and I wanted to share it with you. My prayer is that it will speak to your heart.

Do you know that our Father in heaven calls you a "treasure", beautiful daughter of God? Do you know that our Daddy adores you more than the words could possible say? Do you know your value? Do you know really, truly who you are? You are a treasure, daughter of God. You are the rarest kind, and of the greatest value. God calls you not even a gift, but a treasure, because He knows your worth. He loves you so, for you are His treasure. I want to encourage you that if you seem to be in a place of hiddeness, rejoice! For your heart is being hidden in His heart and in that place, as lonely as it can be sometimes, it is one of the most beautiful places to be.

Do not seek to be seen, for in doing so you present your self a gift, when you were created to be found, daughter of God. In this place of hiddeness let your heart become fully His. Make it your ambition to fully "know" the heart of God, and His love will satisfy every ache, every feeling of loneliness and more, for His love satisfies. And I promise you that the day will come when God will present you not as a gift, but unveil you as a treasure to the man who was willing to seek out His heart, and doing so, he will find you. God has the best picked out for you. Do not even settle for the good that may come your way, for although it is good, it is not His best, and it is God's best that is worth waiting for. Although the wait may seem to be long, rest, daughter of God, rest in your Daddy's heart and have peace knowing that your day will come. Yes, rest, beautiful treasure, and you shall be found. Again I remind you, do not seek to be seen, for in doing so you present yourself a gift, when you were created to be found. Do not present your heart to one who is not willing to seek you out, for he does not know your true value and will not love you as the treasure that you are. You are of more value than even a gift, you are God's daughter, a treasure of the greatest value. Ask God to give you the revelation of who you truly are, and do not settle, oh do not settle for even the good, but wait, yes wait for His best.

And know this, daughter of God: You are worth seeking! You are worth finding!
You are worth loving! You were bought at a price to become a daughter of God!
Do not give yourself away to one who does not know your true value! You are a
treasure to be found, so rest, daughter, rest. And as you remain hidden in the heart
of God, I promise you, your dreams will soon come true. I believe this, for the heart of
our Father in heaven is good and He delights in blessing His children. Rest, beloved
daughter, rest in your Daddy's heart and know this: you will always be His treasure.

AMEN.

The Bra That Brightened My Day

I know loving a bra seems impossible, but I was actually inspired by an advertisement for a bra! While perusing an Avon brochure that randomly appeared in our mailbox, I found myself in the clothing section. As I got to the lingerie, these words popped out at me: Complete Modesty. I was shocked for some reason.

I was so convinced the word modesty was banished from modern society. The description was of discreet patches within each cup. They are designed to keep your look "smooth", if you get my drift. So, I thought about it for a little longer than I should have. This bra is specifically designed to promote modesty!

I won't beat this horse too much, but I will just say that it is very refreshing to see a popular sales mag promote the large art of modesty. I guess I find encouragement in small things.

Pic from Maidenform even though the bra I mention is Bali

I Hate Wrinkles!

Each year I get a little older. Things are not quite the same as they used to be. When I got married, I was thin and perky! After several years and two children, some things have definitely changed.

So as my body changes and skin looses its elasticity, there are some questions I have to ask. When the crows feet come, will I want them tightened? Botox? When the boobs sag and deflate, should I get them filled out and lifted up? Should I give up on sit-ups and schedule a tummy tuck?

Is it vanity? Does it matter?

I think it does matter. How I look affects my self-esteem. It affects how I respond sexually. If I am in shape, I can function better in my daily life.

I like to enjoy what I see in the mirror. There's nothing wrong with that right? But how far is too far?




I can't obsess over my appearance, but I should take pride in myself. After all, my body is God's temple.


I don't know if there is a "right" answer. Just food for thought. I'd love to know what you think.

When the Claws Come Out...

I have seen the most vicious things happen when two or more girls are involved. The situation can get very ugly very fast. I have experienced workplace sabotage and seen boyfriends stolen away from best friends. The adjectives and nouns used to describe other other women can make your neck hairs stand on edge.

Why can't girls get along? It's and age old question, but it still fascinates me. I believe jealousy is at the heart of it.

When I was growing up, I was on the skinny side. Consequently, my nickname was "Snakehips". I had no hips and no boobs. I always envied girls who had them. Crazy, huh?

As women, we're the same way. If someone is taller, thinner, sexier... The list is unending. Soon we begin to cast judgement on her character, simply based upon appearance. She becomes conceited, and we call her names under our breath.

Unfortunately, the Ten Commandments do not allow us to envy others. We are admonished to rejoice when others do. That's a sharp contrast.

Women have enough trouble in the world without tearing down each other. Maybe the next time we see a pretty woman, we can tell her so instead of giving her a dirty look.

Movie review

Recently I watched the movie Penelope with my family.
I'd wanted to watch if for a while, so when Netflix delivered,
I was excited. My hubby, not so much. A movie about a girl that looks like a pig... Why? That's a boy for you! :) For some reason, it made total sense to me. By the way, this movie was rated PG.

So initially, the girl, played by Christina Ricci, had a startling appearance. She was the result of a curse placed on her family years ago, and the only way to be break the spell was to find someone to marry her as she was.

After a series of frightened suitors ran away, Penelope had finally had enough and decided to run away and experience the world in disguise. What she finds is not a man to marry her. Who she finds is herself. She learns about things that she has missed and about what she enjoys.





WARNING: MOVIE SPOILER BELOW!




In the end she realizes that the love she was searching for was the NOT the way to break the curse. The love had to come from within. When she learned to love herself, pig nose and all, the spell was broken. She was no longer waiting for Mr. Right to save her. The secret was within her all along.

How many of us have wasted more than a few years waiting for the right man to come along and fix us. How many of us have stared in the mirror and figured we were unlovable because we weren't pretty enough and had a disfiguration? I know there isn't a girl alive that hasn't struggled with the image she sees in the mirror. But if we can't love what we see, how can we expect someone else to?

But there's good news, even if it takes us a while to reconcile ourselves with the lies the mirror tells us and who we really are, there's one man who's already loved us unconditionally. Enough to lay down His life... He loves us even when we can't yet love ourselves.

A Gem Story

So I was thinkin' about my blog title. Broken rubies. There are several references to rubies in the Bible. Specific women are called more precious than rubies in Proverbs. Sapphires, diamonds, emeralds and rubies are the four precious gems. At least that what I learned in junior high science. Rubies' value varies upon the qualities of the stone. The hardness, the color, the facets.

How different is that to how we as females are valued? We are considered more desirable if we are blond or thin or a certain color or if we have boobs that make Pamela Anderson envious. These judgments affect our self-image and cause us to feel broken inside if we don't meet the criteria.

Thankfully we have a Creator who truly loves us in our rough, unfinished state. He loves us before we have been shaped and without facets and polishing. To Him, we are so precious and beautiful just as He made us. Now, if only we could believe that...