Loving the Unlovable

So lately I've been struggling with loving my coworkers.  If you work in a female dominated environment, you understand the effects of estrogen overload as well as I do.

Between backstabbing and mood swings, I am up to my ears with these chicks!

I told myself that I could just keep it professional.  There is no need for miscellaneous conversations that have nothing to do with the job.  I do not have to smile at pictures of your children or listen to stories about your weekend.  All I have to do is do my job and go home.  Right?

Maybe not.

Is that love?  Probably not.  I don't generally hate to be around those that I love.  I don't generally expect sabotage from those I love.   I am not generally intolerant or dismissive to those I love.  Soooooo, this is is probably not love.

So how do you balance loving your coworkers while protecting yourself at the same time.  Let's face it, work relationships can be dog-eat-dog, so it is necessary to use wisdom.

Step 1.  Grace.  Give them the benefit of the doubt.  Don't be paranoid.
Step 2.  Be kind.  Don't allow others to change you.
Step 3.  Pray.  A lot.
Step 4.  Love.  God told us to, and it's required of us.  We don't deserve it, but He gives it anyway.

When I feel annoyed, I look in the mirror.  I realize that I'm unlovable sometimes, but I still need love.

Together is Better than Separate

How do we impact a world filled with women who chase after things that only destroy them?  How do we influence a generation of women who love celebrities more than self-esteem?  How do we impact a population of women who use sex as currency and live with permanent scars because of it?  How do we divert a train wreck already in progress?

This is where my heart is this morning and always.  Why?  Because I have 2 daughters and 1 son who are growing up in this world filled with darkness and so little light.  Why?  Because I care, not only about my babies, but about yours too.

I can't just sit back and watch as their minds and hearts are destroyed by fabrications and misguided notions.

While searching for news this morning, I saw image after image of half-naked young women posed in provocative positions.  I found celebrity "marriages" and babies born outside of marriage.  I saw divorces and myriad other things to mourn.  These are the images that meet us when we turn on our televisions or log on to our computers.  They meet our daughters and sons as well.  And what do they say?

The images say, "This is what love looks like."

But this isn't true love.  It is impossible to positively influence our children if we don't FIRST address the holes in ourselves.  We have a responsibility to them and to ourselves and each other.  

If you are tired of having your daughters longing to emulate half-naked tweens, join me.  If you're tired of your friends using "real" housewives as role models, join me.  If you believe there is more to life than fame and fashion, join me.  If you want true love and peace in your life, join me.  

I believe in 2 or 3 (Matt. 18:20).

Together we can change the world:  Broken Rubies united for one cause.  Women with broken hearts and broken lives, joined together to embrace the priceless rubies within.  We are flawed women,  beautiful gems (TM). 

Please join me:

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Broken-Rubies/292572877457287

A Marriage Nightmare

I intend to update you on my last post as soon as I wrap my head around everything that entails.

In the meantime, I wanted to share an article with you about choosing a spouse.  A couple of my small group friends shared this article, so I decided to check it out.

I'll warn you that you will need more than a few minutes to check it out, however, I think it's well worth it if you are in a relationship or longing for a spouse...

I've been married for almost 13 years, and I can't stress the importance of being wise when marrying enough.  Marriage is a very serious thing.

Here's the link... http://thechristianpundit.org/2012/08/15/it/

Please come back and share your thoughts on it with me.

Here is my disclaimer:  I am new to the site and source of this article, so I am only suggesting this article because I read it myself.  I may not condone every single point, but I do support the sentiment.

With Friends Like Christians, Who Needs Enemies?

When I survey my life, the biggest hurts I've endured have been at that hands of other Christians.  The times I've been been stabbed in the back the most and maligned the worst have also been at the hands of other Christians.

So it makes me ask, "With friends like Christians, who needs enemies?"

With so much wrong in the world, why do we have so much time to criticize each other for such simple things?  It's not to say that Christians are always above reproach, but we spend the majority of our time trying to tear one another down, if not with politics then by denominational discord.

If, after reading the same Bible, we can't be on one accord, how can we expect to help draw others to God?  If, after attending church from week to week, our hearts remain hard and callous towards those who differ from us, how can we say that we truly love God?

Love is not expressed with thinly veiled hatred or poorly disguised bigotry.  Love does not lift up oneself in order to cast judgment on another.  Love does not claim to pray while spewing criticisms in private.

So what's my point?  Christians need to be on the same page.  We need to remove ourselves from the equation and keep our eyes on Jesus.  Our ministries should model His, not the other way around.  We cannot bend Him to fit what we believe or what we want to be true.  Aligning our ways with His allows us to be on His page from His book.

We've been given an instruction Book for life.  We need only to read and allow His Spirit to help us apply it.

Love

When I think of love I am reminded of a vintage Heavy D song that asks, "Now that we've found love, what are we gonna do with it?"  Even if you're not familiar with the song, I'm sure you've asked yourself that question a time or two.  I certainly know I have.  Love is often confusing.  It makes you laugh and cry; sometimes at the same time.

My husband and I recently celebrated our anniversary.  I told him last week that we always seem to argue more around our anniversary, and I have no reason why.  I'm no closer to the answer today than I was then.  But I do know this:  I'm thankful.  Even when I'm mad at him, I'm thankful to be with him.  God's love has been the model that we've tried to follow.  His love has been the glue that has kept us together even when we weren't oozing love or when challenges have threatened to snuff our love out.

When I at look at the definitions for love found in I Corinthians 13, I realize that I often fall short.  Am I patient?  Am I kind?  Am I thinking of his needs first?  Sometimes.  Not enough, though.   When I am tempted to judge and hold grudges, I am reminded of the grace that God has shown me when I fail.  He shows His love in so many ways.  Can I not love my husband or my children the way God loves me?

The Bible is good at presenting us with challenges.  It gives us something to strive for.  Marriage is hard work, but it's fun, too.  When I love my way, it doesn't work.  But when I love the way Corinthians calls me to, it's like a sweet berry.  It is delicious and satisfying for both of us.  What better expression of God's love than to see His love shine through us to one another?  How can you show love to your spouse or loved one today?

     This post is the first in a new series reflecting on the Fruits of the Spirit.  It is a collaborative effort inspired by my dear friend Karen.  Together, several of us will be exploring the fruits over the next couple of months and sharing what God says to each of us.  Please take some time to visit these lovely ladies for more on the fruit of love:

There is Beauty in Letting Go: http://beautyintheletgo.blogspot.com/

The Rabbit Hole Chronicles: http://therabbitholechronicles.wordpress.com/

The Ever-changing Thought: http://tecthought.com/

A Joyful Journal: http://ajoyfuljournal.blogspot.com/

Marriage is Outdated

Is it true?  Could marriage be on the verge of extinction?  Apparently Cameron Diaz feels that marriage is unimportant and old-fashioned.The divorce rate is high and continues to rise.  Many choose simply to live together without marrying.  Others procreate outside of marriage.
Does marriage still have value?  Why or why not?

Fear of divorce seems to be enough to keep many from ever walking down the aisle.  Why get married if it won't last anyway?  I'm curious what you think?  Is marriage simply a contract with no real meaning, or is marriage a beautiful covenant that can be a lifelong celebration?

My Secret Thoughts

I want to tell you that things have been extremely hard for us lately. Our cars are all in disrepair. Our finances are truly inadequate. There have been times in the last few months when I have questioned God. I have yelled at Him. I have doubted Him. I have quite talking to Him. I have experienced such a range of emotions that I thought I was losing my mind.

I have made futile attempts to stand on God's promises and fallen short. I have wondered how long this season will last. I have wondered what I did wrong and evaluated my life. I have wondered where God was and whether or not He was laughing at me.

But today He spoke to me. As I was putting the finishing touching on dinner, the lyrics to a Fred Hammond song came into my head. Since I haven't heard it in a very long time, I knew this whisper was from God. I instructed our oldest child to bring my CDs, and I began to listen. I fully intended to go straight to that song, but God had another plan. I ended up listening to the whole thing.

I laughed, I cried. I shouted out loud. I prayed and even begged God to forgive my lack of faith. In a way that only He can, He reached out and wrapped me in His arms through each song's message. With puffy eyes, I write this with a subtle smile. My heart feels light, and my spirit is renewed.

Though nothing in my circumstances have changed, my thoughts toward God are back where they need to be, I realize that He has been there all along. I feel loved and protected now in a way I have been missing. I feel immeasurable gratitude.

Trials come to make us stronger and to show God's glory. By the time we pass through this, I will be stronger than Samson with the wisdom of Solomon. I have stomped on the devil's head and let Him know who I have working for me. He has to back off now.

'Til Death Do Us Part

Marriage and divorce are common occurrences in our country. The divorce rate is appallingly high, and many say that no one stays married any more. Gordon and Norma Yeager of Iowa recently died after more than 70 years of marriage. Imagine what they saw and the challenges that they faced during their time together. Any of us who is married knows that at times marriage can take you to your breaking point, but it doesn't have to end in divorce. In joy and trials, marriages are meant to be lifelong covenants with few exceptions. Let their story inspire you to hold on for dear life until God takes one (or both) of you home.

I Hate Weddings

My heart is full this morning. As many of you may know, I hate weddings. It may seem odd that a woman hates weddings, but it's true. I hate them passionately. Here's why...

Once upon a time a wedding was a representation of something sacred. It was a symbol of the commitment before God and each other to work at a holy marriage together, forever. With a 50% divorce rate, we've clearly strayed away from that idea. Divorce is an acceptable option now, and it's expected. Few work at staying married, each too concerned with his own happiness over God's holiness. The ceremony is filled with false promises.

The other reason I hate weddings is the white dress and the veil covering the bride's face. Why is this done? A white dress is a symbol of virginity, and the veil signifies modesty and purity. Do I really need to elaborate? Well, I don't mind if I do.

Today Prince William married Kate Middleton. I saw her "lovely" white dress and virginal veil splashed over Yahoo, and I shook my head. They were away on vacation together when he proposed. They moved in together before the wedding, and with the blessing of the Archbishop! He justified giving his blessing because "modern" couples want to "try out the milk before buying the cow"! Click here for the complete article.

Why the veil? What are you covering when the groom has already sampled everything? Why the white? Are we to believe they've been sleeping alone? Instead of setting an example for all of the young girls watching, they bowed to modernity like so many others before. It's so sad that an archbishop would forsake the Bible and bless their choice.

I want my daughters and son to aspire to wear white honestly. Our society has taken away the meaning. Brides are secretly scoffed at when they choose to do so and haven't earned it. Others simply wear creme or champagne since savvy designers have declared white "outdated" and off white colors "chic". Weddings are about more than "tradition", and we should treat them as such. They should not be a show. One should not say vows before a God that they do not honor with their lives. It's not a requirement, is it?

I am not trying to be harsh, and I welcome your thoughts. I am not trying to be judgmental, as it is my intention to edify. But I do not apologize for speaking truth from God's word. We are commanded to do nothing less.

While fashion trends change, God word doesn't. Sex is to be reserved for marriage. Teaching anything less is to rob ourselves and our children of what married love is meant to be. We can not teach a gospel that follows trends and modern thought. That is faulty at the core. Our lives should conform to the Bible. It is time that Christians stand up and be an example. Let the white of our wedding attire represent the purity in our lives.

Photo from Charliesbridal.com

Lost in 1812

What is it about inspirational historical fiction that gets women so sappy? Why do these authors sell so many books? Who wants to live in the past? What's the big deal? What does the 19th century have that the 21st doesn't?

Innocence. That's the difference. The women are not brazen. They still *blush*, and they actually wear undergarments (sort of). They are not showing so much skin that the men are blushing. They are not chasing men and throwing themselves at them. They are concerned with being a woman of virtue. They are concerned with being a GODLY wife and mother and with having a godly husband.

These differences make these books appealing to those who feel that we have lost much in this so-called progressive generation. Progression is only good when it makes us better. What we have now is not better, no matter how good we women are at lying to ourselves and each other.

Men have not changed what they want in wives. No one wants to marry the girl who has given herself to everyone and shows no signs of slowing down. They still want something to be left to
the imagination. Most probably think a home-cooked meal is a lovely bonus.

Perhaps we should take a page out of 1812 an reinvent 21st century womanhood with that as an example. It doesn't mean we have to pretend to be helpless or stupid, although it doesn't hurt to make a man feel needed. It does mean we should stop using sexuality to manipulate men. It means we should cover up and guard our tongues. It means we should strive more to be a Proverbs 31 woman, and less like a Cosmo girl. For a good example, read The English Garden
Series by Lori Wick.

Celebrate,or Not

Summer is wedding season, so consequently, it's anniversary season too. I've been noticing several Facebook status updates that are celebrating several years of marriage. From 1 to 5 to 50, no matter how many years you've been married, it is a cause to reflect. Notice I didn't say a cause for celebration.

All marriages should not be celebrated. I am not one who believes that one should celebrate simply because you are still together. I saw many examples growing up of marriages that I didn't want for my own.

I'm sure I've said this before, "love is not enough". For us, the 3 stranded-cord is the key. (Ecc. 4:12) God + the 2 of us all bonded eternally together. When God is not at the top of our list and the center of everything, our balance is off, and our world spins out of control. Oh, but when we're in sync with His plans for us, there is purpose and a quiet peace that can only be found by resting in His will.

I'm a horrible cynic about weddings in general. I've been to more than my share and wondered what the bride and groom were thinking and how long it would be until I heard of an impending divorce. Please don't think I want any marriage to fail, because you know that's not the case, but I do think some are doomed before they even get started.

This year we reached the 10 year mark. I've been doing a lot of reflecting. I wish I could say that my reflections showed perfection and no room for improvement. Not even close. There are things that I need to improve.

I want to strive to have a wondrous marriage that demands to be celebrated. I desire to be a worthy example to all who come into contact with us. I need to be an open book, what you see is what you get. No pretense. No surprises. After watching the dissolution of the Gores' marriage after over 40 years, I realize that we are not invincible.

No one truly knows what goes on inside the four walls of a marriage. There may be hurts that go unspoken and secrets that remain undiscovered. There might be loneliness and despair unparalleled. If you are married, pray together daily. If you aren't, pray for someone who is. Marriages are under attack, and only God can truly bind a husband to His wife. Let's make our marriages ones worthy of celebration.

Shut Up!

I'm wondering why women are so drawn to juicy secrets? While I realize that men also enjoy an opportunity to talk about someone's misfortune, women are especially excited by this. I've seen women practically foam at the mouth at the expectation of gleaning a morsel of private information. The main problem is that it is especially prevalent among believers.

I know you're shocked and appalled by this revelation. The church is meant to be a safe haven for those who are broken and weary. I've had a tendency to steer clear of women's groups primarily because I feel that gossip is so often thinly veiled in a cloak of concern or a so-called prayer request.

Gossips are thrilled to spread information about someone's failures or distress. The intent of gossip is tragic, painful and repulsive. A gossip does not care if the information being spread is truthful. She does not care who gets caught in the crossfire. As women, we have much to learn about gossip.

Many women are afraid of sharing their hearts or failures with other women because they don't want to hear about it later on from someone else. They are also afraid that the "friend" they choose to share with is secretly happy she is struggling. Gossip makes it hard to truly empathize with another, and it it in direct opposition with Jesus' teaching. We are commanded to cry with one another and help to bear one another's burdens, not to rejoice in shortcomings.

Proverbs 20:19 says: A gossip goes around telling secrets, so don't hang around with chatterers.
Proverbs 11:12-13 says: It is foolish to belittle one's neighbor; a sensible person keeps quiet. A gossip goes around telling secrets, but those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence. The Bible leaves no question about what should leave our mouths. Since the Bible takes a hard line on being busybodies who have nothing better to do than spread lies, as Christians, we are supposed to do the same. Let us learn to be TRUE friends to each other. Let us learn to glory only in the good things and exercise self-control.

The Death of Self-Respect

When I first started to date my mother gave me some tips (really threats, but tips is more P.C.), about how to conduct myself. She gave me money so that I could always get home on my own if necessary and pay for my own meal or movie. She told me not to accept gifts from men all willy nilly. Nothing is free. She would not permit me to call boys on the phone, they had to call me. "Chasing" men was strictly prohibited. Most of this stuff sounded completely insane to me. Not any more.

As I watch a culture of women "chase" men, I want to put them alone in a room with my mother so she can talk some sense into them. I'm tired of seeing strong, educated, intelligent women throw themselves at anyone with an XY chromosome complement. I do not want to continue to witness the complete loss of standards as women shack up with men indefinitely as they test out the product and try to decide if they're in love enough to "put a ring on it" as Beyonce' says. (although the Chipettes do it better in my opinion, but I digress)

Will this epidemic ever be remedied? Why are women settling for men just because they have the sperm necessary to shut up the biological clock? Why are women taking international trips with perfect strangers just because he's paying? Why are women content to share a married man with his wife just to avoid a few lonely nights? When did we forget to value ourselves? When and why did this shift take place? How can these fault lines be eradicated before generations of brilliant, beautiful women are swept away in their wake? This breaks my heart.

I don't want to answer these questions yet. Partially because I don't have many answers. Mostly because I really want to hear from all of you. Please leave comments. Tell your mamas to leave comments. Send your crazy friends over, and tell them to comment. I know each of you knows someone that you've secretly dreamt of smacking because they fit into one of the aforementioned categories. Here's your chance to vent. I'm waiting...

When Prayers Aren't Enough

Since learning that my young nephew has cancer, I've experienced severe emotions. The first were shock and disbelief. At times I've been gripped by fear. I've also felt helpless. That one tends to linger. I've been praying like I've never prayed before, but sometimes it doesn't seem like enough.

When I read posts from my sister-in-law and her pain is palpable, I feel helpless and sad. When I receive a text from my little brother about the intense sadness he sees in his only son, my heart breaks again and again. I want to make this go away. Prayer doesn't feel like enough.

I am constantly encouraged by their strength and trust in God through this, but I wish this journey never had to begin. Why God? I look at my own children and have irrational thoughts. If you're a parent, you know the responsibility we feel to protect our children from everything. We put a lot of faith in our ability to do so. When illness strikes, our resolve is tested. When we look in the mirror, we see frailty and weakness. Prayer doesn't feel like enough.

His word tells us that His power is made perfect in our weakness. I guess that should be comforting, but someone it isn't right now. I know it will be eventually. But right now, I don't want to feel this sad. I want my nephew healed, and I want it right now. And I want to pray for God's will, but I'm too afraid to do so. I believe in His power, but I don't always understand it. I know that He is sovereign, and I know that I am weak right now. Lord, help me to trust in your perfect power. Help me to know that prayer is enough.

Breaking Up is Hard To Do

Everyday we are forced to place our faith in many things. Sometimes our faith is automatic. We give little thought to whether or not our heart will beat when it's supposed to or whether another breath will follow the previous. At other times the faith is a little more deliberate Sitting down in a wobbly chair and trusting that it will still support you. Still other times, faith is placed in a person, a spouse maybe. We trust that he or she will stay true no matter what life brings. There is not a day that allows us to proceed without faith, but sometimes our faith is misplaced or broken.

This is something I've experienced recently. About seven years ago we purchased a beautiful sleigh bed. It was simply the most beautiful piece of furniture I'd ever seen! Very dark, heavy wood and the perfect curves...a match made in heaven, love at first sight. Our relationship progressed and a trust developed. It saw me through many nights and two pregnancies. Notice I said two...we have three children.

This is where disillusionment began to cloud our relationship. Sometime during the third pregnancy, the bed began to squeak. Soon after we noticed that the bed rails were bowing out. Next the wood began to splinter, and it was downhill from there. We purchased some insanely strong wood glue to repair the rails and reinforced them with metal underneath. Problem solved. Wrong. Last night while the five us relaxed on the bed, our relationship suffered a fatal blow. I heard splintering and then a crash. My side of the bed collapsed. The bed I had trusted for so long failed me. I'm still trying to come to grips with it.

As we hauled away the useless structure, part of the head board broke off! Upon closer inspection, we noticed that our "solid" bed was a beautifully finished compilation of small, compressed wood fragments! It's a wonder it lasted this long!

When we first meet a guy, the first thing we notice is his appearance. Mahogany skin, perfect teeth and chiseled features. If he has a romantic nature and a sense of humor, we're quickly swept away and immediately in love. Soon he has our trust, in spite of the fact that he hasn't earned it. We begin to overlook "squeaks" in his surface. Next we've agreed to marry him, and while it may take some time for the wood to splinter, it will happen. Over time the "compressed fragments" begin to separate, and the relationship comes crashing down.

Had I focused less on the external beauty of the wood and taken a closer look, perhaps we would have chosen more carefully. If I would have done my homework and set my standards higher, I wouldn't feel like I'm at a sleepover. If I'd looked beneath the surface to the character of the wood, I would have noticed its lack of integrity. But I didn't. It's too late to do my due diligence now. The damage is done.

Thankfully no one was hurt. This is rarely the case in love. When we focus on the outward appearance more than the content of a man's heart, destruction is eminent. Avoid placing faith in someone who does not deserve it. Jesus Christ is the only One that never changes. Trust in Him.

A Kid Noone Wants

Apparently the internet brings adoptive children straight into your living room. I appreciate the aspect of convenience, but I find it slightly disturbing to be shopping for children as though they were a pair of shoes or a used DVD. Perhaps I am thinking the wrong way.

Unfortunately, there are many unwanted children born each day. While adoption is often "sold" as a great alternative to parenting, many of these children do not leave the child welfare system until they have aged out.

If I had lovingly placed my child for adoption and later found my child's face plastered on the internet with an advertisement under the picture, I would be devastated. The children are listed like job postings with dates to track updates. How would you feel to see your child's picture posted for months or even years?!

Please don't misunderstand me, I realize the intentions are very good. Anything that helps the child to be adopted... I just wonder if this affects the dignity of the children involved. Please let me know what you think.

Forgiving a Cheater

When a spouse cheats, many lives are changed irrevocably. Lately, infidelity has been gracing the pages of magazines and television headlines. While I have no idea what is wrong with these men, I'm more curious about the women beside them. While I know women cheat, I'm focusing mostly on men because they're the ones saturating the media right now.

The numbers of men in high-powered, influential positions who have devastated and demoralized their wives lately is fascinating to me! What I find even more amazing is the fact that the wives, more often than not, stay right there. Whether standing beside him as he fakes a tearful public apology or trying hard to smile in dignity as she publicly appears with him at a social event, the wives "stand by their man". My question is, "WHY?"

I don't stand in judgment of these victimized women. I feel sorry for them. I hate that they married men who are so cowardly that they cannot tell their wives in private before news of his infidelity is scrolling across CNN during the nightly news. I hate that the father of their children is barely fit to breathe, let alone be an example for their sons. I do wonder why women blame themselves for affairs. Why do they ask what short comings they have that caused their husbands to cheat? Why do they put up with it?

I have often argued with my husband that men will drop a cheating wife like a bad habit, and women will actually beg the cheater to come back to them?!

So that is my question to each of you: Are women more likely to reconcile with a cheater than men? If so, why do you think so? I would love to hear your thoughts. Don't leave me hanging!

I Wanna Be a Shot

On the way to summer school, I was having my usual morning conversation with my little ones. This particular day we were discussing dental hygiene, specifically cavities. My precious daughter started asking questions about the process of fixing cavities. I told her that the doctor will numb your gums with a shot first and then drill into the tooth. She asked me if the shot would hurt. I told her it would hurt, but it was necessary to keep you from feeling the drill. She then said to me, "Mommy, I wanna be a shot cuz a shot hurts everything, but nothing hurts it." That struck me.

My daughter is terrified of shots. Her last well-child check-up was plagued with tears caused by anticipating a shot. The fact that she would want to be one tells me that she is starting to get a taste of what life can do to you. To her, a shot is invincible. Impenetrable. It was a hard statement for me to take as a mom.

She's been dealing with an older child with anger problems who doesn't keep her hands to herself. To date the child has punched her and slapped her in the face. I'm sure you can all imagine the self-control I've needed to use just to look at that girl each day without glowering. I admit that I haven't been that successful. My daughter is dealing with looking different. Having different hair.

I guess sometimes Jesus is our shot. Sometimes He numbs the pain. Other times He simply takes the edge off and helps us get through the process. Like earthly parents, our heavenly Father cares about our hurts. At times He must sit back and allow us to learn a lesson. Other times He intervenes. But always He is there to hold us in the end.

Precious Blessings

Yesterday I was blessed to spend an entire day at my 6 year old's school. There was a luau taking place and parents were invited to help out or simply enjoy the fun. I'd contemplated taking the day off to join in the festivities. For those of us mothers with careers, we are well aware of the balancing act between work and family. Since we are currently short staffed and overworked, I considered those facts also. So, in the end, I decided to follow my heart and help out, and I have no regrets.

I had an opportunity to laugh a lot. I saw my child in silly outfits and listened to her sweet voice over the throng of the others as they sang to us. She smiled so much, and was so happy to look out and see her parents and grandmother in the crowd. I am overjoyed that I was there. My little girl is truly a blessing. My family is truly probably the greatest reminder that God cares about me. Anytime I am tempted to forget that, I can look at my little ones.

I've noticed my own theme of blessings lately. It wasn't planned, but I guess it's the overflow from my heart. Every day we are faced with choices. Sometimes they are life and death. Others simply leave us with regrets if we choose the wrong way. In this case, I'm so thankful that I made the right choice. I'm thankful that I had a choice. I noticed several children without parents they and realized that perhaps they were not permitted to take time off.

There are many people who do not favor women working. I'm not here to argue with them. I am willing to say that wives are placed as helpers for her husband. Is is not possible that this help often comes in the form of employment? Staying at home has pros and cons for all parties involved. They are not clear cut. It is important that women respect and support each other regardless of how we take care of our families. Whether we stay home, work part or full-time.

A Face for the Feelings

If you're wondering why I did not write yesterday, I have a good excuse. Yesterday, we got a chance to see our unborn baby. I now have a face to go with the wiggly movements I've been feeling. It was amazing. The sheer wonderment never ceases, no matter how many times I've been here before. If I wasn't a bum, I'd try to scan in pics for you all to see. For now, imagination will have to suffice.

The perfectly crafted spine, the symmetrical cranium, the life-giving blood flow, the wonderful complement of ten fingers and toes. All seen in spectacular detail. Our children and my mom shared in this with us. What a blessing. Watching the fascination in the eyes of our little ones as they "met" their new sibling for the first time warmed my heart.

I do not take for granted the clean bill of health given to our baby. No abnormalities seen on the ultrasound. Thank you God! The organs are beautiful. The bones are long and straight. As one who sees anomalies on a daily basis, I have untold knowledge of the various things than could go wrong. So tonight I'm overjoyed. The melodious sound of my baby's heartbeat echoing in my ears... God's little rainbow of promise to me.