Love

When I think of love I am reminded of a vintage Heavy D song that asks, "Now that we've found love, what are we gonna do with it?"  Even if you're not familiar with the song, I'm sure you've asked yourself that question a time or two.  I certainly know I have.  Love is often confusing.  It makes you laugh and cry; sometimes at the same time.

My husband and I recently celebrated our anniversary.  I told him last week that we always seem to argue more around our anniversary, and I have no reason why.  I'm no closer to the answer today than I was then.  But I do know this:  I'm thankful.  Even when I'm mad at him, I'm thankful to be with him.  God's love has been the model that we've tried to follow.  His love has been the glue that has kept us together even when we weren't oozing love or when challenges have threatened to snuff our love out.

When I at look at the definitions for love found in I Corinthians 13, I realize that I often fall short.  Am I patient?  Am I kind?  Am I thinking of his needs first?  Sometimes.  Not enough, though.   When I am tempted to judge and hold grudges, I am reminded of the grace that God has shown me when I fail.  He shows His love in so many ways.  Can I not love my husband or my children the way God loves me?

The Bible is good at presenting us with challenges.  It gives us something to strive for.  Marriage is hard work, but it's fun, too.  When I love my way, it doesn't work.  But when I love the way Corinthians calls me to, it's like a sweet berry.  It is delicious and satisfying for both of us.  What better expression of God's love than to see His love shine through us to one another?  How can you show love to your spouse or loved one today?

     This post is the first in a new series reflecting on the Fruits of the Spirit.  It is a collaborative effort inspired by my dear friend Karen.  Together, several of us will be exploring the fruits over the next couple of months and sharing what God says to each of us.  Please take some time to visit these lovely ladies for more on the fruit of love:

There is Beauty in Letting Go: http://beautyintheletgo.blogspot.com/

The Rabbit Hole Chronicles: http://therabbitholechronicles.wordpress.com/

The Ever-changing Thought: http://tecthought.com/

A Joyful Journal: http://ajoyfuljournal.blogspot.com/

"I'm Not That Spiritual Right Now"

So I'm watching Mary, Mary, contemporary gospel superstars right now.  The younger of the duo just found out she is expecting a fifth child and is feeling very overwhelmed as a result.  She is talking to her husband about her feelings.  He starts telling her that God will help them to handle the children and continue to give them all they need for them.  She turns to him and says, "I'm not that spiritual right now."  She says that she is just her plain old self right now.

Oh how that resonated with me.  While I'm not expecting another child, I can totally relate to being overwhelmed.  I can relate to wanting to just be me without thinking of what God's plan is at the moment.  Sometimes I'm reeling too much to focus on where He is in the middle.  I think it's normal.  We just can't afford to stay there too long.

What do you think?  When have you said or thought, "I'm just not that spiritual right now?"  How long did it take for you to refocus your attention on the Man in charge of it all, the One who gives us peace?

When Life Gets in the Way

Truly, my title says it all tonight.  I recently returned to work after an extended hiatus.  Though I spent most of it in grad school, it's still taking some adjusting for me to get used to a schedule again.  Everything has changed.  My wake up time is different.  My bed time is different.  My free time is different.

While I'm thankful and somewhat happy with the new gig, I am frustrated by what has happened to my routine. How many of you can relate?  Change can be so hard.  Life has a way of throwing us curve balls and mixing everything up.  At times we feel like everything is out of our control.  The reality is that everything is out of our control, and that's a really good thing.

Right now I an trying to get back on track.  I've fallen terribly behind on my YouVersion plan, and that disappoints me.  I've been missing meeting with my Virtual Bible Study girls, too.  I am carefully re-prioritizing my recently changed life, and I will be ready to grab the proverbial "bull by the horns" before too long.

He has gently reminded me that His plans for me are good ones; meant to prosper me and not hurt me. (Jer. 29:11)  What changes are you dealing with in your life right now?

Babies Everywhere

If you've been reading for a while, you know I often have questions about the things that puzzle me.  I often wonder if I am the only one scratching her head when something odd crosses my radar.  So what am I wondering about today?  Pregnancy.  

No, I am not pregnant, nor do I want to be pregnant.  I have paid my debt to society and obeyed the command to "be fruitful and multiply" :)  What I am wondering about is whether or not you think pregnancy is sacred and about whether or not we encourage unwed pregnancies in our society.

Please don't think I am being a judge, because that is not my intention.  Often, a single, pregnant woman signifies the fact that she bravely chose to allow her baby to live instead of ending its life.  But that's not what I'm talking about today.

What made me ask these questions is the nude spread a very pregnant, single celebrity recently did.  The other is a photo of two very young, single women posing at a baby shower.

While I don't believe unwed mothers should be stoned or persecuted, I do wonder if the shame and stigma that used to be associated with bringing children into the world outside of marriage, is missing.  

Does the fear of being embarrassed help to deter us from making poor decisions?   If that is the case, are we glamorizing single mothers with many of the shows that we find on television now and the choices of celebrities?  Are we doing ourselves and our girls a disservice?  What do you think?

If it Feels Good

While catching up on a drama via DVR a few days ago, I found myself speechless.  I won't say what show I was watching, but I will say I probably won't be watching it for much longer.  One woman, who is currently separated from her husband, was telling her friend about a sexual affair she's involved in with another man.  She is asking for advice about casual sex.

Their exchange goes something like this:

Are you having fun?
Yes.
Well if you're having fun, and it makes you happy, I wouldn't change a thing.
You're right.

She continues having the affair.  I had to rewind it twice to make sure I heard it correctly.  Wow.  What kind of advice is that?  Basically she gave her carte blanche to do whatever feels good.  I would expect this kind of advice to come from a tween perhaps, but not a grown woman.

I have found myself watching much less TV lately.  I used to enjoy the mindlessness of watching funny shows or compelling dramas or even inspiring reality shows.  The problem I'm having is that everything seems laced with excessive negative drama and/or illicit sex.

The messages are poisonous.  It's no wonder marriages are in trouble.  It's no wonder girls and women are fooled into believing the Real Housewives lives and acting desperately.  Television is sending such powerful messages to us even if we don't realize it.  The media has the ability to chip away at one's values and replace sound thinking with nonsense.

I am not implying that television is evil.  Anything has the ability to be evil.  I am simply suggesting the we carefully choose the things we allow into our homes through our television.

Ask yourself:
1.  Does this show cause me to have impure thoughts?
2.  Does it make me dissatisfied with my real life?
3.  Do I feel guilty after watching it?
4.  Does it compromise my morals?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may want to rethink your tv choices.  I know I am.

The Words We Speak

Yesterday yet another school shooting made national news.  A young man in Chardon, OH opened fire and changed the lives of many families in an instant.  The article I read said that the shooter dressed in a goth style and was teased for his appearance.  It also said that he kept his feelings inside.  Though I do not excuse his actions, I wonder how little emphasis we place on the words we speak to others.

Are we concerned that our hateful words may wound someone irreparably or contribute to such tragic incidences as this?  Do we value our own opinions more than the feelings of those we encounter?  Are we immune to the pain that our tongue can cause?

It is no wonder the Bible has so much to say about controlling our speech.  In James 3:3-10, the tongue is compared to a bridle and a horse and a ship's rudder.  Both are small components that perform the task of determining direction; just as our tongues are small organs that can inflict huge damage.

Sometimes we all have difficulty controlling what we say.  Sometimes hurtful things are said in anger, other times from carelessness.  It is necessary to confess our faults to God and not make excuses.  Contrition can lead to healing and help to prevent tragedies like this one.  Please pray for the families involved affected by this horrible tragedy.

Humbled Beyond Words

I am writing this with tears in my eyes.  My heart is full to overflowing.  I am so humbled that I cannot find the words to express it.  I have just spent the last hour discussing brokenness with some encouraging women.  This was the first actual meeting for the Virtual Bible Study.

I admitted before that starting this study was a big leap of faith for me, totally outside of my usual comfort zone.  But after this meeting, I am already looking forward to the next one.  I feel so blessed by each of them and their unique insights.

I am humbled that God placed me there with them tonight.  I pray for each of them.  I pray that they feel even half as blessed as I do right now, because I feel like I could float away.  I am so glad God gave me the strength to trust Him enough to simply obey.  I am anticipating all that He has planned for us.

He promised He would be with us when two or more are gathered (Matt. 18:20), and He definitely kept His promise.  I am so grateful I was there.